HeLL yEAh!!!!

I was tagged!

2011-11-14T15:13:00.004+11:00

miss them a lot!!

My bro tagged me. I have never done this before. but since he asked, why not! I m not in the mood to think either!

So, here are the rules and regulation.
Each person must post 11 things about themselves in their journal.
Answer the question tagger set for you in their post and create 11 new questions for the people you tagged the answer.
Choose 11 people to tag the post and link them to the post.
Go to their page and tell them you have tagged him/her.. No tags back okeh?

And these are the questions I’ll need to answer (with their answers);

How ambitious are you?

I am very ambitious and I would always try to get em! 2 fulfilled, more to be materialised! Insyallah!

Do you cry at movies? if so, which movies make you cry?

Cry like hardcore? Nope! But teary eyes yes. Love You Man caused me tears since I could really feel it. Its about friendship and buddy. Yeah! could feel it!

If you could go back and change something about your high school days, what would it be?
I want to pass my PMR with flying colours so that I could be with my friends there longer. *sigh*

What does love mean to you?

It means everything to me. It doesnt only mean love to the opposite sex, it means a lot more than that. To me, love is everything! YES! EVERYTHING. Love means taking care of each other and be for each other in time of bad or good! Caring is love! Taking care of each other is definitely love! Yup! Love to me is everything!

Spender or a saver.

Spender! TOTALLY! B.I.G SPENDER!

How important is your family to you?

Really important! I have 2 big bros, 3 sisters, 1 lil bro, a dad, my makcik, my along and angah, my anak2 sedaras and my cucus! I love them all!

How romantic are you?

I am very romantic! CAPITAL ROMANTIC!! Just dont get me start ya! hehe. If running in a train with a bouquet of flowers from KL to Johor doesnt mean romantic, then.... what is? huhu

The worst thing you ever did to your friend.

Lie!

What something you know you do differently than most people?

I clean my nose with a rolled tissue like everyday! hehe.

Your biggest regret.

There is one! But regret would never build you. so just face it and walk pass it!

Why are you, you?

I m so unique and critical. I think a lot and sometimes I couldnt sleep just to think about something. I m a practical person and very determine in what I do. I m flexible, but yet aim high. I expect perfection and would always try to be such! A very motivated person, and when I said something, I really mean it. I face my problems and would always try my best to be better and better. I m unstoppable and always hold on to my principal that is...I will survive! and would always do thing in my own way! Independant indeed and.... of course...... caring! I care a lot about how people think of and about me. I m unique and difficult! that is why I am who I am!

& heres 11 things bout me,

1. CARING

2. LOVING

3. INDEPENDENT

4. BAD WITH MONEY

5. LOVE PUBLIC SPEAKING

6. DARING

7. PRETENTOUS.

8. DETERMINE

9. MOTIVATED

10. LOYAL

here's my ANSWER TO a very simple questionnaire posted by my BRO. ;p

What your parents calls you?

Aki / Zaki

What your siblings calls you? (if you dont have any, consider your cousins or close relatives)
Acu / Dik ki.

What your friends calls you?

Primary: Zaki

SecondarY 1: Michael

Secondary 2: Y-men

Uni 1: Zek

Uni 2: Muhammad.

What name people usually calls you?

Zaki /Zack

Have you ever watched a horror movie alone in a dark room? if yes, what movie is it?

Yes! I cant recall since I switched it of after that!

What cartoon character suits you the best?

Owh! yes! My friend santhy said "You are so similar to spongebob since you cant just sit there doing nothing. You would always be jumping up and down, and nakal!"

Which part of yourself you hate @ dislike the most? can be body parts, or internal maybe attitude

I dont like the part where I can detect liars since it hurts A LOT!

What do you think about guys who cooks?

Awesome!

What do you think about girls who cant cook?

Typical!

What kind of attire or clothes which you think guys should never wear?

Skinny tight jeans/ pants! Gosh! looks so like bangau! and I do think it would cause 'senak perut!"

What kind of attire or clothes which you think girls should never wear?

Bosom revealing clothing! Euwww!

Now its my turn:

1. Do you think you are so special until you look down on other people?

2. What do you think of people who pretend a lot?

3. Have you ever lied to anybody and feel no regret at all about it?

4. What is your food craving?

5. Have you ever being caught lying?

6. Have you ever judged other people wrongly?

7. Has anybody told you that you cant do something but you insisted in doing it and you finally agree with that person that you actually cant do it?

8. Who is the dearest person in your life now?

9. Have you ever caused problem to others?

10. What is the one thing you want to get rid off and why?

11. Have you ever wish that you were someone else?

Ok! Back to work!

It stays here!

2011-10-18T20:05:00.005+11:00

The best bday I had! ... enough said!

The first... and ... hmm...

http://cjaybestbud.blogspot.com/2009/10/happy-birthday-bro-zack.html

...^_^...of all the people in this world...^_^...

2011-09-26T14:34:00.003+10:00

Can you guest who is that guy (stripy shirt) which appeared in The Star, Monday 26 September 2011 (page 4, StarMetro section)?

a. I
b. Me
c. All the above.

Haha! Lucky Monday! I'm smiling BIG! Yeah!

Keletihan Julai... tapi seronok juga...

2011-09-21T18:35:00.006+10:00

Last july I was all over the place. Courses here and there. However, there is this one event where I think is the most tiring of em all. BTN 2: Bina pasukan... damn tired. Here are some of the photos (with me in em!).

before we depart! wah! I look so slim!

me! in action! So drama king!

Up! up ! and away!
Ikat Rakit sampai tgn luka n sore for weeks!

We cookwd! We served! We ate! We owned them!

Me in action with Keli aka Catfish!

I just cant take photo normally, can I?

Love this sooooo much!

Before the action begin!

Hiargh!!!!!

Lentok time!

Ready to float! weehuuuu!

I look bad in trekky!

Morning call!

Cheer! Cheer! Cheer!

Smile! Terpaksa!

Tired lahhh!

Me! Climbing down the wall!

Helping Feroz with his 'crotch" hahaha!

That is all folk! There are many more! However, they are arranged not in order since I just simply jumbled them up! Anyway! I was so tired!

Ps: I look cool lah! hahaha.

Guys in action HUARGHHHHH!!!!!!!

2011-09-10T15:15:00.005+10:00

Selain kami sibuk lawan Angry Birds, memancing, main bowling and other games menggunakan Miss Tabby, kami juga berkesempatan mengamuk di hari raya ke 3. Yup! we burned many things. Look at these pictures. We BERSIHkan apa yang patut. And the popular lines for that day were..
"Kite bakor je! Kite bakor!"
and "BUANGGGGGG!"
hehe.

The heavy infested store room was cleansed, and we do hope rats wont colonise the place ever again! shuh! Shuh! So, if other people were enjoying taking photos with babies, we on the other hand were perspiring burning what should be burned! ROAR!!!!! Kill kill.. die! die!!!

Javelin throw! or more like pokok pisang Amok!!!

fire... fire....

We made it! Yeah!!!

Dont play soft with me! or I will senduk you! hua hua hua.

The NOT so gleely family. Hoho! Look at my shirt! Ooh!! Memoryyyyy!

Love it love it LOVE IT ... A LOT!

2011-09-10T14:15:00.003+10:00

I managed to get my hands on her...latest album....
Indeed, it is so awesome! Good music. However, her voice, her music is so familiar. I wonder, who is her idol since she indeed sound soooo... familiar.
When I listened to her songs, I kept on thinking about Baby Spice. I dont know why... hmm

This is my current fav...

Love its lyrics tooo... you go Gomez!!!

My Dilemma- Selena Gomez

You make me so upset sometimes
I feel like I could lose my mind
The conversation goes nowhere
'Cause you're never gonna take me there
And I know what I know
And I know you're no good for me
Yeah, I know what I know
And I know it's not meant to be

He's my dilemma
One half of me wants ya
And the other half wants to forget
My-my-my dilemma
From the moment I met ya
I just can't get you out of my head
And I tell myself to run from you
But I find myself atractted to my dilemma
My dilemma
It's you, it's you

Your eyes have told a thousand lies
But I believe them when they look in mine
I heard the rumors but you won't come clean
I guees i'm hoping it's because of me

And I know what I know
And I know you're no good for me
Yeah, I know what I know
And I know it's not meant to be

He's my dilemma
One half of me wants ya
And the other half wants to forget

My-my-my dilemma
From the moment I met ya
I just can't get you out of my head
And I tell myself to run from you
But I find myself atractted to my dilemma
My dilemma
It's you, it's you

I could live without you
Your smile, your eyes
The way you make me feel inside
I could live without you
But I don't wanna
I don't wanna, oh
Oh, you make me so upset sometimes

He's my dilemma
One half of me wants ya
And the other half wants to forget
My-my-my dilemma
From the moment I met ya
I just can't get you out of my head
(Get you out of my...)
And I tell myself to run from you
But I find myself atractted to my dilemma
My dilemma
It's you, it's you
It's you, it's you
It's you, it's you
It's you, it's you
It's you, it's you
It's you, it's you
My-my-my dilemma

Raya Raya!

2011-09-08T18:12:00.005+10:00

Assalamualaikum WBT. And it is not too late for me to wish

SELAMAT HARI RAYA
.

to all

May this Syawal bring you everlasting happiness.

Well this year, I managed to drag all my family members to get together and snap our family photo. FYI, we are not the 'typical' protocol family where every Raya morning, we are going to line up and ask forgiveness from our parents. Our way, since before, would be so simple. We wake up early, make some noise, take turn to take shower, make some noise, eat, make some noise, get dressed, make some noise, get ready to go to mosque, make some noise. Then, in between we are going to ask each other's forgiveness, hug each other and make some more noise. Yup! We are not the typical 'displayed on TV' kind of family. For us, where ever we are, we are going to hug each other whenever we meet, then make some noise. So, to really sit down, line up and take photo would be so not us. hehe.

This year, I just wouldnt let another chance goes by. So, after we had our Kenduri Arwah, after all guests had left, I said to all my family members, "Jom semua! Beratuq! Ambil gambaq!" Then I ran into the house, grabbed my tripod and pushed the sofa aside, and asked all of them to sit down. Yeah! I did it! Some of them wanted to get change la, nak pakai baju raya la, I said "Tak payah! let us be the normal, neutral, natural as, as the way we are!"
.

So we sat down together, set some cameras on tripods, and then...

SNAP!
.

SNAP!

Well that is all I can say! The old LOUD family of mine. This memory will remain forever. If I m no longer around, at least they can still see me in these photos.

From left: front row- Fara (my anak sedara's wife), Lila (my grandaughter), Aina (anak sedara), Lisa (cucu), Zunnur (anak sedara), Safiya (anak sedara), Along Shima (anak sedara menantu susu aka sepupu ipar).

Second front row- Ee (my anak sedara), Fifi (anak sedara), Ayiz (anak sedara), Tachik (anak sedara), Mohamad (anak sedara), Una (anak sedara) and Kak Kilah (anak sedara)

Third row (the otais)- Baak (my brother), Kak Chaq (my sister), Pak ( my dad), Bang Chaq (my bro in Law), Bang Halim (my bro in law), and Cikpah (my sister)

Fourth row- B.Jun (brother), Kak Ana (sis in law), Kak Yang (sis in law), Kakak aka Dik No (my sis), Abang Hazni (bro in law), Along (my cousin aka anak sedara susu), Akeem (my anak sedara), Eril (anak sedara), Aiman (anak sedara) and last but not least... Ana, Me, Moah!!

(Ji-ah is not in the photo since she was asleep in her cradle.)

That is all for now. More raya piccies will be uploaded soon. Now, its time to work... T_T

I can now online non-stop!... weeeee!!!!

2011-08-28T19:08:00.003+10:00

I was 'away' offline for too long! My lappy is not that ok. He is old and weary! But i still need him when I need to do some hardcore design and office works. Anyway... to make me online more, and to make my life mo flexi... I have treated myself with.....

tadaaaa.....

hehe! Chomeyyyyyy ah! Have been using it for a week. i havent ventured it that much, but Miss tabby doesnt dissappoint me! O' love! I have now have a new toy to play with!

2011 is a year of new things. gadgets etc. So.. I can wait what more change will I face or do! Anyway.... i m still the same ol me. The caring, pasionnate and loving person. Just that I have added some new flavours to my 'self''. Another BIG change is coming over... just wait.. or maybe I can say 3 BIG CHANGES will take their place. hoho.

Overal, Samsung Galaxy Tab is awesome! No regrets in buying it. Sorry Ipad2. I think you lost it for now!

Ps: These are all the MIsses in my life

a) Miss V

b) Missy V

C) Cik Non

d) MIss Tabby

e) Miss Mooo

f) Miss Delly

cinta teragung

2011-08-21T11:55:00.003+10:00

A very good video which can make you remember the purest love of all. Dont mind the video. Just focus more on the lyrics yah! its sooo beautiful

Maafkan aku sekiranya tak termampu
Untuk mencurahkan semua isi hatiku
Ternyata tak terkata
Rinduku padamu

Chorus
Ku takkan bisa menjadi lebih
Dari apa yang terdaya
Namun ku tetap berjanji
Akan masih mencuba untuk
Memujuk hatimu
Mencintai aku
Kerna semua yang ada
Hanyalah untukmu

Secebis perasaan ku hamparkan
Membawa sejuta harapan
Menagih cinta
Teragung darimu

Ulang Chorus 2X

Maafkan aku sekiranya
Tak termampu untuk
Mencurahkan semua
Isi hatiku

Pondering Point "-_-

2011-08-19T12:02:00.004+10:00

SOGO DIHURUNGI MANUSIA SHOPPING RAYA

Pagi tadi, as I was getting ready for work, I switched on my TV. MHI was on. I kind of like to watch MHI early in the morning, especially if Wardina is on since she is REAL! She would simply say things which will later let us say 'Hey! That's true!"

By the way, this morning, Wardina was not on duty. Instead, they had Abby Fana with a guy which I cant recall his name.

There was this one slot, they invited Dato' Fadzilah Kamsah to take some calls and kind of console the callers.

Today, they discussed about Perbelanjaan Menjelang Aidilfitri. And what makes you 'tension' when Aidilfitri is around.

A caller from Seremban (a lady) called. She nearly cried. This is her story...

"Saya sudah lama tidak merasakan hariraya. Setiap tahun, saya akan tengok kembali baju yang lama-lama, dan saya akan alter, jahit semula ataupun saya akan tambah bunga atau corak bagi baju tu nampak lain. Saya penoreh getah. Saya tak mampu, jadi baju lama tu lah saya buka, dan jahit semula. Saya tambah jahitan bunga, biar nampak baru."

"Setiap pagi raya, saya memang tidak akan ada dirumah. Sudah lama mcm ni. Saya dan suami akan keluar menoreh dipagi raya. Kalau ada dirumah, pintu dibuka, nanti akan ada tetamu sampai. Mcmana saya nak jamu mereka makan? Apa pun saya tak sediakan. Saya tak mampu"

"Ada anak, tapi mereka tak pernah balik sewaktu hari raya. Mereka langsung tak pedulikan saya dan suami. Jadi, bila raya, mmg itulah yang kami akan buat. Kami menoreh"

Well... from the story, it was kind of sad to hear that. I did not hear everything, however, from comments made by DR Fadzilah Kamsah, it seems that, the children left the mother because their mom got married to another. Then they kind of neglecting the mother. So the mother cried.

Hmm...

Who to blame when this thing happen?

Then they talked about pembahagian balik beraya between spouse. This one, for sure I can reflect since I have seen this a lot of time. Fadzilah kamsah sangat betul! Kita tak boleh terlampau rigid to what we have agreed upon masa kita nak kawin@ baru kawin dulu. CTH:

"Nanti bila dah kawin, kita take turn balik raya. This year rumah ayang. next Year rumah Aling."

Yes! We must bertolak ansur. Ikut kata Fadzilah Kamsah, utamakan pihak yang ada ibu@ ayah tua. Tambah pulak kalau ibubapa dah uzur. anak sorang etc. Kita tak boleh nak berkeras jugak nak ikut giliran seperti yang kita janji dulu masa sebelum kahwin. Semua kena guna common sense.

This thing happens several times in my family. I really want to comment here, but I dont think it is kind of 'that' appropriate. Cth: If mak sakit. yng tinggal cuma anak bujang lelaki. At least kena la sorang anak perempuan balik tolong mak buat persiapan raya. tak bolehla suami nak juga berkeras nak balik ke kampung dia disebabkan giliran dah sampai. Semua ni boleh di ubah guna budi bicara. Suami isteri kena la saling memahami.

Byk kali aku tgk arwah mak nangis disebabkan hal mcm ni. Ye la. Dia tak larat nak masak apa semua. Anak2 pulak semua berkeras nak ikut turn. Kalau tak ikut nanti masalah pulak. Tu la kalau orang pelik kenapa aku boleh memasak, sebab mcm ni la. When you have ageing and old parents you have to take both roles; a daughter and a son. so kena pandai buat dua-dua. Pandai buat kerja dapur, memasak, kemas rumah, tak bermakna lembik atau pondan. Orang yang tak boleh switch role tu yang mmg patut malu sebab dorang hanya rigid kepada sesuatu benda. Lelaki: kerja berat. Xboleh masak, x boleh kemas. So shame on them.

Satu lagi, we have to reflect ourself. Apa akan jadi kalau kita ditemapt dorang. Just take the case of my mum. Even though, she knew that she could count on me, tp at the same time dia nak la juga anak pentingkan dia sikit. Ye la! Dia sakit. So anak2 le kena guna OTAK dan fikir semua ni. Just imagine, what would you do bila you are in their position. Kesian.

Aku pun kadang2 kesiankan diri sendiri. Apa tak nya, slalu anak lelaki lepas raya je, sure gi sana sini beraya. But like my case, I have to stay at home (in the kitchen) to help my mum serve guests and all. So, tak dapat join raya di dunia lelaki out there.

Duduk dapur, kemas2, hidang makan mmg dah biasa dah. Kalau tak aku buat, sapa lagi? But, now mom is no longer 'around' so I just buat tak tahu je. Now... Raya means... tido! haha.

Satu lagi fazilah kamsah commented on some people's behavior yang bila raya, nak tukar semua satu rumah. Semua kena baru. So dia kata "itu pemikiran gen-Y. Orang dulu-dulu. Skrang gen-X, dah takda semua tu."

Aku sangat setuju. Dulu, kalau raya, semua perabut nak ganti. skrang people just make do with what they have. many things can be reuse and recycle, so why bother to buy new ones? So just forget the Kak Timah menyambut raya kind of lifestyle. Keep it simple and sweet. Save some money, buy gold dinar, and save for your future.

This raya, I have decided to
wear last year's baju, songkok etc.

buy a few shirt since malaysia is in sale. So buy some good shirt, (esp office attire)

buy some biskut raya for contigency.

buy new office shoes. hehe.

stay at home.

till then.. See ya.

*I m busy, but I m just lost!

YOU SUCK AT LOVE!

2011-08-08T18:30:00.006+10:00

OMG! How can these people manage to play carom in the office, while I dont even manage to breathe properly! Sicko sicko!

The due date is really near. 22/8/11. How many days left? gosh! a few more days! Need to set some appointments. Manage to get one, but what should I present! Mati loooooooo!

Working mood at home, so no no! What I want to do at home is just relax and enjoy my brown sofa.

AND shaite!!!! these people can still play carom and made noise like shaiteee!

Today! Simple Plan.... since 10am till now! loving them a lot! their new album is somewhat 'fresher' and milder than before. Enjoy their 1st tune so badly! and also, as usual their slow number is soo AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSSSSSOOOOMMEEE! love it love it!

Today... the sound of carom and annoying people laughing is submerged in my SIMPLE PLAN! you guys rawksss!!!

YOU SUCK AT LOVE!!!!! X0X0

Last night...

2011-08-03T19:04:00.003+10:00

Last night I went to Tarawikh. The surau is just a stone throw from my house. The surau is equiped with air-conditioner so people would be flocking there just to 'enjoy' the coldness. However, that is not the case.

Last night, when I was praying, I just couldnt stop myself from crying. My late mum's image flashed non-stop in front of me.

I heard her voice...

"Jom la kita pi terawih. Mak nak jalan pegang hang. Kuat sikit mak rasa."

Then, I could still remember her saying...

"Torchlight ni tak elok dah. Nanti hang beli baru kat mak. Senang mak nak bawak pi terawih."

And this the one that made me cried harder...

"Ki... hang buka posa makan apa?"

and for sure I miss her masak asam ikan masin a lot. This is my fav sahur dish.

Now....

I wont be able hear her voice again. I wont be able to hold her when we walk to the nearest mosque for tarawikh. I wont be able to taste her best masak asam ikan masin....

Raya is coming... and for sure

I wont be able to kiss her again. I wont be able to ask for her forgiveness. I wont be able to hug her. I wont be able to see her waiting for me by the door while I m cleaning the house.

Truthfully.... I wish raya would never come so that I wont have to face the sadness and the emptiness of not having the person that I cared the most. My mum.

My brother smsed me last night. He said...

"Raya ni aku balik kampong. Kita pi lawat mak"

My sister smsed me last night. She said...

"Aku rindu nak call mak pastu dengar dia kata "Na! Ni mak ni!""

My other sister said this to me..

"Kalau mak ada boleh la aku pi terawikh. Bolehla mak tunggu adik"

And my other brother texted me and said...

"Bayangkan bagaimanakah keadaan Ibu juga Bapa yang mendapat doa dari anak2nya yang berniat disetiap amal, pahala untuknya terus2an."

Everything yesterday was about my mum.

I miss my mom badly. She is gone, and I m now so lost and lonely. Feel like a dust in the thin air. No direction and hopelessly floating, wondering where will I land once the wind stop blowing.

To all you out there...

love your mum and cheerish her love. Appreciate those who love you 'coz you would never know when they will be taken away from you. 'coz once they are gone, it is useless to even cry blood. They wont be coming back.

Yup! last night I cried.

Mak! Aki sayang mak!.

AlFatihah.

~n~

Emotionally Not Good At All!

2011-08-02T15:03:00.004+10:00

Sigh! Here I m. sighing again. Yup! I dont really know how should I describe my feeling now. Should I feel happy or should I feel sad?

Well.. financially I am doing great. I also heard that some good news are coming too, but I m just not in the mood to feel happy. I smile, but just a faint smile.

Last weekend will definitely be the moment that I will remember untill the day I die. There are still many things left unsaid, but trust me, I would never EVER want that kind of thing to happen again. Feel so hopeless and lost now. I do hope the 'spilled' things would make it better. Now, I truely agree with some counsellor's advice that is... when you happen to face any conflict, you must let it out. If you keep it in you, it will definitely be a time bomb, just waiting for the right time to explode.

Well, Ramadhan is here and its time to 'mend' and 'fix' yourself. Its the healing season. I do hope I wouldn't be dragging my Ramadhan in sorrow. I want to see lights at the end of the tunnel. I want to be better. A better human, a better muslim and a better..... erm... brother. I do hope Allah would give the chance to prove it and I do hope He (Allah) would permit such and grant all my Doas. I will definitely send my prayers everyday, non-stop, at least 5 times a day (after my solah).

There are a few things that I would not miss in my Doa. Of of the thing is to hope Allah would let me become a better brother and a better muslim. I know I m not perfect, but I will try my best to be at least a good brother and muslim. I have my ups and downs too. I have my emotion turmoil too. I do know that Allah would help me go through them all and be a successful person. Insyallah. He has the power.

There are a few things which I will have to complete within these 30 days. One of them will definitely change my future (Insyallah).

I just hope that my shoulder is warm and good enough for some other people to lean and share with me all his/ her hiccups.

To all people whom I love dearly, please forgive me. I need you guys in my life and there is no hidden agenda underneath it. You guys are so special and I want you guys to stay. I love you guys more than I love myself. Enough said. You know who you are.

Now the lyrics of this song is playing in my head repeatedly. Just cant shut it down. So here it goes, I share it with you.

One Republic- Come Home

Hello world hope you're listening
Forgive me if I'm young or speaking out of turn
But there's someone I've been missing
And I think that they could be the better half of me

They're in the wrong place tryin' to make it right
But I'm tired of justifying

So I say to you come home come home
'cause I've been waiting for ya for so long for so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all I see is you and me
And the fight for you is all I've ever known
So come home

I get lost in the beauty of everything I see
The world ain't half as bad as they paint it to be
If all the sons and all the daughters stop to take it in
Well hopefully the hate subsides and the love can begin

It might start now yeah
Or maybe I'm just dreaming out loud

But until then come home come home
'cause I've been waiting for ya for so long for so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
And the fight for you is all I've ever known ever known
So come home ooh

Everything I can't be is everything you should be
And that's why I need you here
Everything I can't be is everything you should be
And that's why i need you here

So hear this now come home come home
'cause i've been waiting for ya for so long for so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
And the fight for you is all i've ever known ever known
So come home come home

Salam Ramadhan to All. Wishing you a great month ahead. Insyallah.

Tips 2: We are contributing to our own problem in the classroom!

2011-07-20T17:09:00.003+10:00

8 Things Teachers Do To Encourage Misbehavior
by Michael Linsin on December 4, 2010

All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again I've been tryin' to get down to the heart of the matter -Don Henley, The Heart Of The Matter
Teachers cause much of the misbehavior in their classrooms.

True, students come to class with behavior issues and personal agendas. Some are prone to misbehavior and are difficult to deal with. A few may even enjoy trying to disrupt your class.

But more often than not, the teacher is the problem.

If you were a fly on the wall of teachers who struggle with classroom management, you would find many commonalities. Among them are teacher behaviors that actually encourage students to misbehave.

Teaching is challenging enough. Putting yourself behind the eight ball by your own doing can make it unbearable.

Let There Be Light

The only classroom management-related problems that don’t have solutions are those we’re unaware of. Once illuminated, there is always a way to solve the problem or make it manageable.

In that spirit, the following list represents things teachers do unknowingly that encourage misbehavior.

1. Talking over students.

Talking over students breeds inattentiveness, side-talking, and poor listening. If your students have trouble following directions, this is often the culprit. The simple solution is to wait until you have the full attention of your class before speaking.

2. Rushing around.

Being in a hurry creates tension in the classroom, causing restlessness, excitability, and poor behavior. This common mistake is easily corrected by trimming the fat from your curriculum, being better prepared, and then slowing down.

3. Answering call-outs.

Answering students who don’t raise their hand encourages disrespect and communicates to your students that your classroom management plan is no longer valid. Condition yourself not to respond no matter who asks a question or how insightful it may be.

4. Moving on.

Continuing with lessons or instructions when students are inattentive–or worse–lets them know that less than their best is good enough. Wait until your students are giving you exactly what you want before moving on.

5. Negative thinking.

Negative thoughts about students always bubble to the surface–body language, tone of voice, sarcasm–causing resentment, misbehavior and, ultimately, revenge. Choose to see the best in your students… and that’s what they’ll give you.

6. Irritability.

Showing frustration, taking behavior personally, reacting emotionally. These self-sabotaging behaviors will weaken your influence and undermine your ability to control your classroom. Instead, keep your cool and lean heavily on your classroom management plan.

7. Clutter.

Classroom clutter shows a lack of pride that rubs off on students and leads to unwanted behavior–the broken windows theory at work. A pin-neat, attractive classroom, on the other hand, is congruent with, and transfers to, values like hard work, neatness, respect, and character.

8. Self-defeat.

Believing that students decide whether or not you have a good class is a belief that virtually eliminates the possibility of creating the teaching experience you really desire. The fact is, we create the class we want, not our students.

The Heart Of The Matter

These eight teacher behaviors cut straight to the heart of why so many teachers struggle with classroom management.

Rules and procedures. Incentives and consequences. They’re important, to be sure.

But they alone are not the answer.

You must get to the heart of the matter, which is deeper than stickers, strategies, charts, or time-outs. It’s more than outside circumstances. More than names on a roster.

The heart of the matter is YOU!!

Some good tips. No 1: No Shush!

2011-07-20T16:37:00.003+10:00

I'm really interested in classroom management issues. This focuses on how you can control your students and how you make the best of the class period. While browsing some articles for my next project, I found these informative points. So for all educators out there... just scroll down and learn, ok!

Why You Shouldn’t Shush Your Students; And What To Do Instead
by Michael Linsin on May 21, 2011

When you hear a teacher shushing students, it’s a good sign things aren’t going well.

Behind tight shoulders, tired eyes, and index finger poised over puckered lips, you’ll find a teacher struggling to keep his or her head above water.

Shushing students to quiet them down is associated with shaky-at-best classroom management, chronically distracted students, and a mountain of stress.

And because it becomes progressively less effective the more you do it, shushing promises more and more frustration as the school year rolls on.

Though not as self-sabotaging as yelling or scolding, shushing similarly makes teachers less likeable with students.

It also makes you look like you don’t know what you’re doing.

Follow the steps below and you’ll never feel the need to shush, hush, or plead for silence again.

1. Decide

Before starting any activity, decide the voice level you want from your students. It’s important you consider this ahead of time. After all, if you don’t know what you want, your students won’t know either.

2. Model

Gather your students around you and model precisely the voice level you expect. Make your modeling exercise as detailed and realistic as you can. Your students need to see and experience what you want before it makes sense to them.

3. Practice

Ask your students to turn to the student(s) next to them and discuss their favorite movie or other topic using the voice level you modeled. Have them practice and prove to you they understand what you expect.

4. Observe

Good teachers observe a lot to make sure their expectations are being met. Start your activity and monitor their voice level closely—especially within the first several minutes.

5. Stop

If at any time their voice level gets louder than your expectation, instead of shushing your students, stop the activity by signaling for their attention. Do this whenever they exceed the level you’ve asked for.

6. Remind

After getting your students attention, remind them what the voice level expectation is and put them on notice that if anyone goes beyond it, there will be a consequence—as promised by your classroom management plan.

7. Enforce

Listening and following directions should be one of your classroom rules. As such, if any single student is unable or unwilling to keep his or her voice level as modeled and practiced, then enforce a consequence.

Note: With group discussions, voice levels tend to increase as students attempt to talk over the other voices in the room. If it becomes loud enough to distract individual groups, simply stop them, ask them to take a few deep breaths, and then restart the activity. Do not, however, enforce a consequence.

8. Standardize

Consider standardizing the speaking levels in your classroom. For example:

Level 0: No Talking
Level 1: Whispering
Level 2: Small Group Discussion
Level 3: Whole Class Sharing
Create a small poster for reference and before every activity say simply, “For the assembly today, we’re at level zero.”

Effective At Any Grade

It may take a week or two for your students to get the hang of it. But when they do, controlling noise and voice levels in your classroom is easy and becomes something you never really have to think about.

Setting voice level expectations—for partner sharing, group work, browsing in the library, or just a walk across campus—through the super-effective one-two combination of detailed modeling and student practice works at any grade level.

And it’s so much more effective than having no clear picture of what you want, no expectation to model for your students, and no sound strategy to modulate the voices in your classroom…

Other than a great big ugly, “Shhhh!”

Courtesy :
http://www.smartclassroommanagement.com/2011/05/21/why-you-shouldnt-shush-your-students/

Confession of a single working guy!

2011-07-14T21:20:00.004+10:00

Yeah! That is true. I have a confession to make. I m DAMN busy. I even am doing my work now. It is 8 pm and I m still in the office. It has been 4 consequitive days that I am being the 'penunggu' of this office.

Guess what? I have many things to be done. And out of a sudden, I am now a leader, a project manager, a coordinator for so many things. Just imagine. They are all not easy. With proposals, with books, projects, presentations, coordinations.... i m now going crazy! i m like the busiesnt staff in the office.

Yesterday morning I had a fight with a technician from the photocopying company. He swore to me in Mandarin. Then I replied. And last night... had a fight with my bro! My words seems to be accepted wrongly, and my so called try to cheerish him, turned out to be disastrous. And his mood was not good too since he had his problems too. So last night, we brothers had a fight! A big one. But, being the elder brother, I wouldnt just let things to get worse. I said my sorry. i m not sure whether he will forgive me. but I do hope 'air dicincang takkan putus.' So sorry bro. T_T

last night didnt have enough sleep either. Woke up several times. Had terrible dreams and being awaken by some smses late at night from some people.. then... the world ended and continues this morning... sighs!

today.. i skipped lunch! i just couldnt eat. Just to think about my piling works, my argument with my bro, my health prob, my personal problem, and other issues... just get my blood goes up and up and UP!!!!!! and HEADACHE!

today, after my 2-hour class, I sit here, at my table, and refuse to get up. I got away from the table just for a cup of air suam and toilet and solat. the rest... here I am. glued to this seat.

Oh ya.. what makes me update my blog while I ve got so many things to do? coz i feel so terrible. i just need to tell somebody how terrible I am now. Wanna tell my bro, but surely he is still mad at me. Hope he is fine and enjoying his time there. so here, I am blogging for like 5 minutes.

there are so many swear words I would like to shout out aloud now, but I just cant coz I am alone, and I dont want pak guard (while doing his routine 'roaming') would hear me and think that i have gone mad!

I have to let it out anyway.. so here it goes....

FUCK.... FUCK.... FUCK!.... FUCK!....FUCK!.... FUCK!

I have been Quite Quiet!

2011-07-08T12:27:00.003+10:00

Mua in action!~ lalala

I m caught with so many things. Yup! I havent logged in to my FB account for like weeks. I m so busy with so many things. I travelled a lot lately. From Penang to Ipoh to Seremban to Shah Alam to Seremban to KL to Penang to Kuala Lipis to Penang to Seremban to KL to Seremban to Lenggeng to Seremban to Lenggeng to Malacca to Seremban to Malacca to Seremban to KL to Penang. Pheww! Luckily I have miss V with me.

Yup! Miss V has a lil' sister now! Missy V. Hoho! I hope Missy V will be taken care of carefully. And I m sure she will be good!

I have got another big project involving thousands of people. I m glad that I managed to enjoy my 'holiday' lately. *Enjoy ke? ahaks*. (^0^)

Watched many movies. Transformers was the last one. Watched it at Times Square. but I didnt enjoy it that much. why? coz the 3D spectacle didnt suit my current being.. I mean bespectacled! I had to keep on adjusting it to ensure that it wont fall down... if not.. I will be seeing the frame of that 3D spect all the time.. and since the cinema is SOOO BIG, people kept on going in and out of the cinema. I dont blame them though! It was a 3-hour movie! what do you expect! and... sadly, i felt asleep! haha.

erm... Witnessed some things which I PRAY would never happen again. I do hope that person would think wisely before doing something that would put him in a mess. Think and think again before doing something. Learn from the past please!

Financially, I think, I m doing ok. (o_o)

Career wise, going strong....but... I hate it so much when people start labelling me with labels like:

"Boss's pet!"
"The Most Important Staff" etc etc..

Stop labelling people please.

My sun-burned skin is getting better. Still itchy and scratchy! but getting better.

Lately feel so lonely. Dont blame me, I had a company for nearly a month. So to get use to it.. needs time.

I m fasting today. It has been 3 consequtive days. Today is my last day! Yeay! What's for brekky? seriously no idea!

I want to bla bla bla on the movies that I have watched but, I m so not in the mood to describe loooooong about things. Want to know more just go to :

http://cjaybestbud.blogspot.com/

or

http://sicipol.blogspot.com/

you will find them all there. Owh, by the way... suddenly this song comes out in my playlist.. so... read the lyrics and feel it...

MALAM- M.Nasir

Malam
Bila rinduku bertambah dalam
Kau datang lagi dengan kenangan
Oh! betapa dinginnya malam ini

Kasih
Bila malamku bertambah kelam
Seribu kisah melintas mata
Dan malam ini sungguh mencengkam

Bila malam
Tiap kali ku pandang semalam
Resahku sering menjadi dendam
Hatimu ku rasakan dingin

Dan malam
Adalah masa yang membawa kesan
Pada diriku yang kesepian
Kini ku tenggelam
Di bawah alunan ombak malam
Oh! malam

Bila malam
Tiap kali ku pandang semalam
Resahku sering menjadi dendam
Hatimu ku rasakan dingin

Dan malam
Jika dikau dapat bicara
Katakanlah pada hamba
Mengapa dia pergi membawa hati ini
Oh! mengapa
Oh! Malam

Ok! Must get back to work! this entry is just for my short break from falling asleep. Have been sitting here since 8.00am working on my book. Brain got jammed, so I bla bla bla here.

By the way, tmrw and the day after tmrw will be my working day! yeay!!!!!!

Alfatihah buat Azaryna Noh (aka. Aza)

2011-06-13T14:46:00.003+10:00

Berita yang aku dapat from Blog Cik Fatin is indeed nearly bring me to tears. Well, I know Aza quite well. We went to Sydney together in the same flight and we lived at Msian Hall. We bumped into each other quite frequent. I could still see her in her red jacket/ sweater walking down the stairs, or just plainly lined up for our lunch or dinner. She was talkative too. But later, she was quite passive and I didnt see her that much till I m back in Malaysia 2 years ago. i got to know that she is suffering from Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis (ILP) which makes her lungs malfunction. I, Fatin and Jan did visit her when she was hospitalised in Malaysia years ago. Yup! She did lost weight. And once incident which will make I remember the visit was when she cried in front of us. Only she knows the suffering. Now, Allah has taken her earthly suffering.

I cant imagine what if the thing happen to me. Allah, please! Forgive me.

Here I attach some links to her stories. May us all learn something from this and take care of our health.

Azza.... Alfatihah buat kamu.

Click sini untuk kisah beliau...

http://http//www.utusan.com.my/utusan/info.asp?dt=1017&pg=kn_01.htm&pub=Utusan_Malaysia&sec=Kesihatan&y=2010

Ps: Sorry! I dont have her photo with me right now. So only this I found while googling her name.

Monday is THE DAY!

2011-06-06T10:30:00.002+10:00

owh! How I love MONDAY!!! T_T

Watch this if you are bored!

2011-06-01T13:18:00.005+10:00

Well here I am, writing on another post for today. huhu! I m bored. Now, seriously, several months ago I did mention about some DVDs series which I bought. Community is one of them. Seriously, I was influenced to buy this series after a 'minah salleh' had a look at it and giggled. So I guess, it must be a good one. So, I took the risk, and bought it. At first, I was not really interested to watch it, until 1 fine boring day, I just tried my luck. And now... I am addicted. It kills my boredom.

Community is an American television comedy series created by Dan Harmon that airs on NBC. The series is about a group of students at a community college in the fictional locale of Greendale, Colorado. The series heavily uses meta-humor and pop culture references, often parodying film and television clichés and tropes.

Meta-humour aka metajoke here means :
self-referential jokes (This kind of meta-joke is a joke in which a familiar class of jokes is part of the joke),
jokes about jokes (the fact that the joke explicitly talks about other jokes or when jokes make fun of poor jokes by replacing a familiar punchline with a serious or nonsensical alternative), and
joke templates (This kind of meta-joke is a sarcastic jab at the fact that some jokes are endlessly refitted, often by professional jokers, to different circumstances or characters without significant innovation in the humour).

Community centers on:
Jeff Winger (Joel McHale), a disbarred lawyer going to school for the first time after his bachelor's degree is revealed as fabricated. The series focuses on the experiences of Jeff and the study group he accidentally forms while pursuing Britta Perry (Gillian Jacobs), a student trying to get her life back on track. The other members of Jeff's study group include Pierce Hawthorne (Chevy Chase), a millionaire on a late in life voyage of self discovery; Annie Edison (Alison Brie), a young straight-laced student; Troy Barnes (Donald Glover), a former high school star quarterback; Shirley Bennett (Yvette Nicole Brown), a single mother going to school to jumpstart her brownie business; and Abed Nadir (Danny Pudi), a pop-culture obsessed film student. Former Spanish teacher, now student Ben "Señor" Chang (Ken Jeong) attempts to join the study group in the second season.

I m also thinking of getting their soundtracks since there are some songs from the series which I think can fit nicely in my playlist. They are:

Track listingCommunity (Music from the Original Television Series)

No. Title Artist Length
1. "At Least It Was Here (Community Main Title) – Main Title Version" The 88 0:35
2. "101 Rap" Donald Glover and Danny Pudi 0:35
3. "Getting Rid of Britta" Chevy Chase, Eric Olsen and Tom Wolfe 2:15
4. "Pierce You Are A B" Eric Olsen, Tom Wolfe and Jacques Slade 2:21
5. "Pierce Raps" Jacques Slade 0:36
6. "Night Cap" Jacques Slade 2:10
7. "The Way It Is" Chevy Chase 0:59
8. "Community Medley" Ludwig Göransson 4:37
9. "Somewhere Out There" Donald Glover and Danny Pudi 2:09
10. "I Never Die" Jacques Slade 1:50
11. "Sensitive Night" Yvette Nicole Brown 1:01
12. "Party Where Your Heart Is" Trevor Armstrong 1:01
13. "Annie's Song" Eric Olsen 1:37
14. "Episode 119 Medley" Ludwig Göransson 3:43
15. "Come, Take a Trip In My Air-Ship" Chevy Chase, Danny Pudi and Joel McHale 0:46 16. "Some Worries" Chevy Chase, Eric Olsen and Tom Wolfe 2:10
17. "If I Die Before You" Ludwig Göransson 2:49
18. "At Least It Was Here (Community Main Title) – Full Length Version" The 88 2:50

I managed to laugh along with the characters in the series. You will laugh too if you understand their jokes.

So If you are bored, please go and watch this. I m thinking of getting the second season. I m sick of GLEE, so I guess Community would be my next crave! GO GREENDALE and the HUMAN BEINGS.

~ TQ Wikipedia! ^_^

wanna watch these movies???

2011-06-01T10:15:00.004+10:00

Howdy! Its a booooring Wednesday! Wednesday used to be my movie day.USED TO BE! sigh! When it comes to Wednesday I will be thinking a lot about movies. These are some of the movies that I m thinking of watching and they are on now! I WANT TO WATCH EM ALL! waaaa.a.a.a.a.a.a

Anybody wanna join me???

I m Diamond. -_-"

2011-05-31T12:56:00.003+10:00

I listened to this song several times and seriously the meaning is... hmm... you read lah on your own! I m addicted! Go Salmah (as what Tok Pah said!)

Penyanyi : Salma Mentor 5
Mentor : Erra Fazira
Lagu : Aku Permata
Komposer : Taja ( Meet Uncle Hussain )

Lirik lagu Aku Permata – Salma Mentor 5

Terdampar jauh dihempas badai kuhanyut
Hati merintih terkunci mulut membisu
Perjalanan yang jauh bagai tiada sudahnya
Liku ranjau kutempuh dalam mencari jawapan

Di sudut kecil hatiku sering berkata
Apa yg terjadi ada hikmah sebaliknya
Kuberanikan diri menongkah arus yang deras
Demi hari esok ku relakan

Walau tiada tangan menghulur
Kan ku tetap berdiri teguh ku bangkit semula
Tuhan, hanya engkau mengerti
Perjalanan hidup seorang insan

Kini ku jauh memetik bintang di langit
Berakhir musim dingin kini mekar bunga indah
Tinggallah memori terpahat di dalam dada
Terjawab sudah segalanya

Aku hanya ingin merasa
Kemanisan hidup di dunia yang kudambakan
Tuhan hanya engkau mengerti
Perjalanan hidup seorang insan

Walau tiada tangan menghulur
Kan ku tetap berdiri teguh
Ku bangkit semula
Hanya titipkanlah doa
Agar permataku terus bersinar

Agar permataku terus bersinar

Durian oh Durian!

2011-05-31T12:00:00.003+10:00

Read this Article and you will see how Durian is TOTALLY HUGE in China! I mean.. people are willing to pay a lot just wanna have durian. While I, on the other hand cant really take em. huhu.. Read on. Courtesy Yahoo news!

..Kuala Lumpur (The Star/ANN) - I am getting a bit worried about the fate of the King of Fruits in Malaysia. Imagine, if only a fraction of the 1.3 billion people in China decide that they prefer durians over mandarin oranges, will there be any left over for us back home?

I reckon that Uncle Donald in SS2, and many others who tempt us with varieties ranging from the Kim Hoo to the Ang Sim, the Hor Loh to the Ang Heh, and also seedless types named after certain politicians, must now be looking at new marketing strategies.

Will they still want to offer us the "All you can eat for RM10" or "Eat Till You Drop" packages when a bigger market is now ready and open?

Over the past few months, Chinese officials have reportedly been sniffing around Malaysia's durian plantations to check on our food safety standards. And we have passed the test.

So when Chinese Prime Minister Wen Jiabao visited Kuala Lumpur at the end of April, he formally agreed to allow the entry of Malaysian durians into mainland China.

We are very happy, of course, and our government even sent a gift of 200 frozen durians to Wen to express our thanks. Nice gesture.

And now it is left to our planters and entrepreneurs to take up the challenge. But I do hope they will not forget the domestic market.

It's tough enough that we lose some of our best durians to our neighbour down south but can we withstand a sudden rise in demand from the Chinese? Will we be left only with the kampung (village) durian while the branded ones are exclusively for export?

After all, we are all familiar with the story of how Macau's Gambling King, Stanley Ho, recently sent his private jet to collect 88 durians from Singapore.

Ho spent approximately 4,800 ringgit (US$1,585) on the fruit which he bought from the 818 Durian Stall in the city-state though we can safely assume that the fruit, the Musang King variety, came from Malaysia.

It works out to 50 ringgit per fruit, not counting the transport costs. I guess this is really small change to the super-duper rich.Ho didn't eat it all but reportedly shared the bounty with his good buddy, Hong Kong billionaire Li Ka-Shing.

Interestingly enough, a recent Forbes survey shows China now has the second most number of billionaires in the world, after the United States.

According to Forbes, China is home to 64 of the world's 937 wealthiest people, but various estimates put the actual number of billionaires at between 400 and 500. What if all of them want to eat durians?

We all know that the King of Fruits is not something that only the very rich can afford. In fact, it is very much the common man's fruit, so can you imagine how big the demand will be if the ordinary Chinese suddenly realise that when it comes to durian, only the Malaysian variety is the real thing?

Our neighbours up north will have a tough fight on their hands, having monopolised the market in mainland China all these years.

According to an Associated Press report, Thailand has dominated the durian trade for more than three decades. It shipped about 138,000 tons of durians worth nearly US$70mil last year to mainland China, which bought nearly 60% of Thailand's global durian exports, according to UN trade statistics.

Malaysia, according to Fama (Federal Agriculture Marketing Authority), produces about 330,000 tons of durians a year, mainly for domestic consumption.

How much of that will now be exported is anybody's guess. But, hopefully, any fight to control the China market will not get prickly or raise a stink.
...

Terrible night... Last night!

2011-05-25T16:10:00.003+10:00

After kena marah last night, I was thinking of going to bed and sleep since Dr asked me to have a rest. I went to see the doctor because I have been coughing for nearly a month. That doctor said that I should be admitted to the hospital if the condition persist. Then he prescribed me some medication. I dont want this thing to get worse as I need to drive for long hours very soon. So I dont want to be coughing while driving.

Then, around 9 pm, as I was getting ready to go to bed, my stomach began to rumble. Actually, i felt weird since 7pm. But I thought it was just a minor discomfort. Then, OMG, I couldnt sleep last night since I kept on visiting the loo. This morning, went to the doctor again, and he gave me an MC. Wuhuhuuu! thinking of going back home and continue on sleeping, but I cant! Many works need to be done. So here I am, in the office... even though I got an MC. huhu.

Terrible night eh? lepas kena marah, nak tido tak boleh, cirit birit, sakit perut, sampai pagi ni! huh! what a terrible night! hmm...

Lesson to be learned... dont take mamee for lunch! huhu. T_T

Gosh! What have I done??? Y_Y

2011-05-24T16:46:00.002+10:00

I have to finish writing a book which is due NEXT WEEK.. but here I am changing the layout and design of my blog! It'a almost 3 PM and I havent start working on my book! I m doomed!

It's payday, but I need to save up some money. need to go somewhere and need to buy somethings. Hoping that I would have enough 'funding'. huhu

hmm... still coughing and didnt manage to sleep well last night due to the cough.

It's raining and I m thinking of being an active blogger once more. To do that I need a constant lappy which can be on and off in a jiffy. I have an eye on a gadget. But not sure when I will make it mine. huagh!!!! MONEY---------- DATANGLAH!!!!!!

10 things I hate!

2011-05-24T10:21:00.006+10:00

1. Workin'!

2. Looking at my full bank account (I mean full of transactions... and the balance is nil.. huhu)

3. Scars! Argh!!!

4. ..........LIARS!

5. People think -ve of me!

6. Feeling l...o...n...e...l...y...!

7. People who don't appreciate what I have done and never thank me!

8. Pretentous people! you guys PLEASE JUST GO TO HELL! Shuh! Shuh!

9. People keep on asking me when I m gonna get married and why I m still single! WTF? I rule my own life so.. just be it lah! It is not that I dont want to get married, but it is difficult to be MR Z ok! So stop asking!

10. People that I love@care don't treat me nicely! enuff said! (I put it in a harsh way just now, but I deleted it! Y_Y)

Hohoho! That was easy! I took less than 30 seconds to type all these. And actually I can continue more and more and more and more.. but.. its ok! I dont want things to turn ugly! .. lalala

To those yang terasa ke apa ke, sorry k. *We should tell the truth even though truth hurts! i hope i can win somebody's heart since I m telling the truth! lalalalala! :P huhu. *Gotcha!!

ps: Whatever the thing is, I still love you even though you put me in your 10 things I hate list. T_T

What Do I Have In My Playlist? ~My Top 10 Fav Songs (in many categories)

2011-05-23T12:33:00.007+10:00

10 Current Fav Songs. (not in any particular order)

1. Insyallah- Maher Zin (When I feel down, or hurt, this song will sooth me!)

2. Beribu Sesalan - Ning, Shila, Jac (Just like it no obvious reason)

3. Sedetik Lebih - Anuar Zain (I love the orchestra)

4. Kisah Hati - Alyah (Love the Video So Much)

5. Talking to The Moon - Bruno Mars (Please refer to to 9 Songs..... below)

6. Jars of Heart - Christina Perry (I'm hurt.. everyday!)

7. Forever in My Life - JOjo - (This is the first song my bro gives to me and it remains my fav since then. TQ bro)

8. Mengenangmu - Ning, Shila, Jac (Its about a great lost - This refers to my late mum. Mak love u forever)

9. Come Home - One Republic - (I will listen to this song when I miss my buddy so much.)

10. Thank You Allah - Maher Zin (the title tells it all)

9 Songs Which Make Me Recall My Past Love lifes. (I dont have to elaborate further T_T)

1. Almost Lover - A Fine Frenzy

2. Kekasih Gelapku - Ungu

3. Kau Tercipta Untukku - Ungu

4. Can's Smile Without You - Barry Manilow

5. Cinta Ini Membunuhku - Ungu

6. Always on My Mind - Willie Nelson

7. Talking to The Moon - Bruno Mars

8. Lelaki Ini - Anuar Zain

9. Fall For You - Secondhand Serenade

8 Songs Which I listen to when I'm Angry or Working Out!

1. I Dont Love You - MCR

2. I'm Not Ok - MCR

3. What Goes Around - Alesana

4. So What - Pink

5. Memories - Guetta

6. Mr. Brightside- Blink 182

7. Bad Romance - Gaga

8. Beggin - Madcon

7 Songs Which I Like for Various Reasons

1. Empty- The Click 5

2. Blurry - Puddle of Mud

3. Never Knew I Needed - Ne-Yo

4. Lagu Untukmu - Meet Uncle Hussein ( My Fav Melalak Song too!)

5. Memori Tercipta- Shila

6. Malam- M.Nasir (So poetic!)

7. Perpisahan - Anuar Zain ( I hate saying goodbye!)

6 Songs which are so inspirational... well at least to me

1. Ku Ada Kamu - Adira

2. Stay The Same - Joey Mcintyre

3. Raise Me Up- Josh Groban

4. Open Your Eyes - Maher Zin

5. Forgive When I Whine - (I cant recal its singer. Its a very beautiful poem)

6. Gemilang - Jac

5 Songs which I dedicate to all my Friends and My lil B.

1. Teman Terulung - Anuar Zain

2. Teman - Jac, Shila, Ning

3. Happy Together - Beatles (but like Simple Plan's version better)

4. Ku Ada Kamu - Adira

5. 1, 2, 3, 4 -Plain White T's

4 Faizal Tahir's Songs Which I like

1. Hanyut

2. Sampai Syurga

3. Kasih Tercipta

4. Selamat Malam

3 Fav Songs which I use as ringtones now.

1. More - Usher

2. Pieces - Sum 41

3. God Got Us Falling In Love Again - Usher

2 Songs that I dedicate to my Bro yg Kijam.

(which I hope will accompany him go through his tough life and make him know that he is special in every way!... and he is not alone!)

1. Hold On - Michael Buble

2. Count On Me - Bruno Mars

1 song which is my life theme song.

1. My Way - Sinatra

thank you! hoho

10 things I love

2011-05-20T12:57:00.003+10:00

1. I love myself.

2. I love my late mom.

3. I love money!

4. I love food.

5. I love Sydney.

6. I love expensive things.. Bling bling!!!

7. I love movies.

8. I love food!

9. I love texting.

and...

10. I love YOU! Hua hua hua!

10 things about me

2011-05-20T12:31:00.003+10:00

1. I have 6 senses... Its for real!!

2. I love buying things for myself.. even though I dont really need them. ^_^

3. My current hobby is sleeping...

4. I hate liars. Enuff said!

5. Love to write and tell stories, but dont have time to really record them all.

6. I am a workaholic... that is why I have so many works to do.

7. Love to travel and driving.... love Miss V A LOT!

8. Love food ! FOOD! FOOD!

9. I love challenges

and....

10. I have 1 younger brother.... yang kejam T_T

I should be dancing! huhu ^_^

2011-05-19T10:14:00.005+10:00

Last night, I watched Showdown 2011 again! Gosh! I m not really interested in watching their battle, but I m more interested in watching how they display their talents, I mean during individual group performance. To date I have 2 fav crews. They are:

and ....

I really wanna watch these 2 crews battle it out till the end! They are so creative and cool!

the rest.. just ok ok only!

Droooling... Salivating....

2011-05-18T17:40:00.004+10:00

GOSH! Om EM GEE! I m so damn busy! but at the same time I M TOTALLY BORED!!!!

Need a change! MUST do something!

Kodek2 intenet kejap... tadaaaa!!!

My new wish list! huhu!!!!

I do hope this thing will make me happier... while doing my work, I can fondle-fondle this thing! wooooo!!!! so stimulating! So ghairah!!! woooooo....~

Its ICONIA bebeh!!

When I said BZ... I mean it!

2011-05-11T13:42:00.004+10:00

Haloo.. am Back!

Last week I went to Poli Perlis. trust me the place is so serene. but the service there sucks. BIG TIME! I was there for 4 days. Basically, nothing much can be done there. There was a swimming pool, but I didnt have the mood to swim in it since I was the speaker. So Image kena jaga beb. So i didnt even go near it.

Ok.. bout the service! Yup! the organiser sucked! They didnt know how to treat their guests. From 5 stars, I will definitely give 1 star!

I was hoping to have great time there, but I didnot since Che Mat went back to Kelantan. Tried contacting Peon, but till the last day, didnt manage to meet him. He was busy with something. But definitely I had enough rest at night. I slept early. During the day, I was busy conducting the sessions, at night.. apa lagi! ZZZZZZ la. huhu.

I went to Pasar Malam Pauh. Tried pulut ayam, nasi beringin, ketam celup tepung, udang celup tepung, and many more. Yup! I was really full that night and slept like a log. huhu! but, I had forgotten that i cant eat pulut. So until now, my stomach is still kind of windy. huhu. Then, went to buy some mangoes. In case if you dont know, Perlis is well known for its Harum Manis. I bought some harum manis, and pelam tonggek. hehe. the later one was nice too. they call it as tonggek because of its shape. Bought some of that. I didnt bring my camera that day and I was so damn hungry so I didnt take any photo. I ate everything.

owh! by the way, days before that I went to Kuala perlis to eat the famous Laksa Kuala perlis...

wah! i want to type some more, but suddenly boss called me and asked me to submit report. so!... what to do!. i sign off dulu! will be back!

just a preview:

i will talk about Jus Bandrek, Movie marathon, my nephew's university offer, my Iranian speaker and lots more. Insyallah.

I m really busy now, working on a book somemore! wish me luck! weehoooooo!!!! T_T

and HATYAIIIIII! huhuhu

so when I said busy, it does mean busy! FB? gosh! where got time! but today... ALICE is calling! huhu. byee~

Blurbing; Part 4.5: of HOT.fm and pee in public

2011-04-26T17:31:00.004+10:00

Hola! Iam back. Let me continue on with my next episode of what happened to me yesterday. yup! Its about what happened yesterday mourning! I turned on the radio, hot.fm to be exact and Fara Fauzana was on air. She was talking about lie and liars and those who were lied! Then she opened the line for the listeners to call. Well suprisingly, I LOVE this topic so so musch, so I called. Lucky me, I made it. They put me through and there I was chatting with Fara Fauzana. Wuhuu! I 'luahkan' what ever things were on my mind and she even asked me to act with her on air. Haha! funny. I chatted with her for like 5 minutes. She did ask me to advise those people out there who loves to lie. I just simply say 'For those who have lied and are lying... just remember your time will come and please do remember the story about 'si pengembala kambing." and I said it for real. (for those who have forgotten, si penggembala kambing is about a pengembala kambing who loves to lie. He lied about his sheep being eaten by tiger and stuff. till one day, real tiger came. Since lying was his forte (his natural talent) so nobody trusts him anymore. and all his sheep were eaten by the tiger. So moral of the story, if you keep on lying, one day, people wont trust you anymore and your lie will surely ruin you.)

back to the story, after 10 minutes, I could hear my voice on air. hua hua hua! I sounded different. But ok! sounds cool! like a rock star! Yeah!.. they edited some parts and I felt glad that I made the call. Why? So that i can spread or remind everybody out there that lying is not a good thing to do. Definitely you will hurt somebody. So if you really love somebody please be true to them. Just explain the real thing. Please dont lie. It hurts a lot. 'If you really love me, please stop lying"

blurbing: part 4 : preview

2011-04-25T20:40:00.001+10:00

Will be back for the latest update tomorrow! it will be about my call to HOT.FM!. Huhu! Cool eh! tungguuuuuu!!!!

Blurbing: Part 3- My cool last week!

2011-04-25T19:25:00.002+10:00

Last week I managed to enjoy myself to the fullest. I am now feel rejuvenated and ready to face "come-what-may!" These were the things that I did recently aka last week!

a) Karaoke-ed!

I karok like mad last week! I and my other counterpart had great time. Melalak like mad. I lost my voice for a couple of hours and I chowed down a jug of Coke. Gosh! I sang like no other business. sampai batuk2! felt as if my lungs are popping out. But I had great time! Seriously! Now I can list all my fav and must-haves karok songs:
1. My way: Frank Sinatra.... definitely!
2. Summertime: cant remember its original singer
3. Dan Sebenarnya: Yuna
5. Mimpi yang sedih : Broery
6. Laguku Untukmu : Meet Uncle Hussein

Lalalala! lepas melalak, I felt relax! Gosh! Feel great!

b) Movie sessions

Yup! It was like months since I last watch movie. Last week I watched some great movies. Worth to mention here is Roommate. It was not that great, but many people screamed in the theater. yup! you heard it right! Well, Leighton Mister is quite ok. To say that she can take more psycho roles.. well I dont think so! Other girls can surely make it better. She can be a bitch, but a pscyho.. ah ah! not for you Rebecca! Or may be because I m too fond of her role in Gossip Girl. But definitely, again, in the movie she is the top-to-toe designer label girl. She is born that way! Other movies, well, they were ok.

c) Schwimming!

Haha! Funny! How I m into this thing. I cant swim... YET. i Bought a pair of googles. And swim is definitely for stamina! So why not! Schwimming! lala!

d) Sleeping!

OMG! I m now have become a koala! My new hobby is sleeping! MAN! I want to make it as my career! For to anybody out there who is looking for a part time 'sleeper', please call me! BTW... not in cinema mind you! Those days have gone! As a new person, I will sleep in comfort! huhu.

e) Shoppinnnnn~

Lalalala! Shopped for some interesting gear. The sale is on, so I grabbed this chance to update my wardrobe. I feel more confident now! before this I was afraid that people are going to look down on me. ya la! Pakai smart2, then drive kreta cabok! So now! hehe! the new posh me, I guess! lalala! Thinking of wearing a muffler. owh! not to forget! last week, I bought a seriously cool bandana! And for the first time in my life, I wore a bandana! Even my sister was quite shock to witness it! Well, me need to change! and me did it! owh! i wore it when I went to KL last 2 weeks. Cool! I was in the train, and it was nobody biznessss! huh!

Bought a few things for my house, for my Miss V (my new companion.. love u miss V) and definitely for myself! Love to buy more! Just wait and see. the shopaholic is back! how I wish I can go shopping with my shoppin' buddies : Ju, Mimin and Fafa. Well its my money to spend! I dont have to worry since they are all my money! I work for it, so I deserve it! Spend like nobody biznesss! So I really do realize now that i m actually livin in luxury! its my money, and I can spend it in anyway that i like. I dont use other people's money! I own it! so ... whateverrrr~ (while moving my head.. bitchy way!)

f) Masaj! (Massage!)

Yeah! will definitely go there again! Owh my! that masseure really know where to picit! wow! Mengerang kawe dibuatnya! tapi.. dalam sakit tu.. ehem... ehem... sedap! hehe.... (not a public issue to talk)

g) facial~ lalala!

I miss my beautician already! Alice is so damn beautiful! her skin is so damn fair! I think I have fallen in love with her. haha! I went there several times already, and she would call me for another session. "Jaki! Bila nak datang! Dah lama I tak jumpa you!" hehe. So last week, I went to see her. Lalala. Swipy, swipe! I dont care! I want to live my life to the fullest! Will visit her again in 2 weeks time. Or maybe after my Hatyai trip! Takut nanti sunburn then habis lah hasil sentuhan Alice ku yang ku chentai! Muah! love u Alice. Facial session is definitely a calming one. you lie there and the beautician will work on your face. I had diamond on my face, mind you! It was kind of hurt, but I was ok! Now the scars are healing! yup! true true! I m having problems with my skin now! late night sleep and work stress and stress caused by others definitely have ruined my face, But! i m gonna be occay!

h) Dating.

Should I call it as a date? well.. I dont know. I wont describe further. I malu! hehe!

i) Batu feringghi session!

Yup! went there and bought some good series. I chatted with a minah salleh there since they were talking about this series which I cant remember its title. Its about a problematic poor family and how a father is trying to keep abreast with everything. No! this is not definitely a drama! Its an awesome one. fun to watch!

I also bought Lie To Me. This is really close to me. I really want to see the gift that Allah has given me. so everything is potrayed in the series. I will definitely watch it. It is not easy to be a person who has been lied several times and you know about it. So i guess the series depicts me. A must watch!

I also bought another funny series. its about an adult who is back in school for a mission. many mishaps happened. It is kind of funny thought!

Wow! I have so many series to watch! well! with my new home entertainment system, I can just simply sit in front of it for hours. Planning to invite Hakim and the gang for a steamboat too! Dah lama x makan steamboat! With great company and pelahap like theirs, i m pretty sure the stock that i bought last week can finish within seconds. Bought some new interesting steamboat materials. and definitely it would be awesome. I m just waiting for them to finish their exam on 27th. then masa untuk hungga gungga! yeah!

j) lepaking at penang with my borneo friends

1. Alfred and Anne. huhu! the last time I met them was like 5 years ago when I attended an elocution contest at PKK. 2 weeks ago they came here to Penang! We went to Hard Rock! AGAIN! huhu! Had enjoyable chat with em. Susah nak cari those who can understand you. But they were talking about similar things as I do. Did some luahan perasan to them. Alfred, without knowing it, is actually from Kuala Penyu! Wow! I was shock to know that too. My next trip to labuan will definitely include a trip to his kampong! Planning to ask him to take me around too. And may as well ask him to take me to Pulau Tiga. My dream pulau! hua hua hua! Alfred was my roommate when I was studying before. We shared many things and he definitely cant forget about my mad obsession towards yo soy betty la fea! and he said that i watched telenovela A LOT! hish! I did not! only betty occay!

I can keep going on and on and on about how much fun I had last week and couple of weeks. But I really need to stop here.

I am planning to have an awesome getaway to Hatyai, Jakarta and Bali (Insyallah) this year! Tq for all my friends who have been there for me!

One think I have learned from my previous experience is that:

Dont trust others buy yourself!
Be not for others but for yourself!
And be merry with friends! holaaa!!

will be back tomorrow for part 4... Insyallah!

blurbing: Part 2- Hatyai Trip- plan!

2011-04-25T19:11:00.002+10:00

Well, tallking about my trip to Hatyai, yup! I am definitely ready! I am not in the process of booking for accommodation. I am going with my 3 lovely awesome friends: Che Mat, Jaja and Mas. Huhe! These are my sincere friends. Rarely they 'break' my heart or make me feel cheated! Theyse are definitely true friends that we must look for. Sincere, thoughtful, tak kedekut and for sure they are REAL! Especially Che Mat! never dull moment if you spend time with him. He is like my buddy, brother and my bestEST friend. That is why I love to and looking fprward to travel with him. Dont let me not talk about Jaja and Mas. These are 2 awesome chicks. Chickadess! Huhu!

We are planning to spend a couple of days there in Hatyai. Jaja is really into photography and I am pretty sure that a-day trip wouldnt be enough. Probably we are going to spend 2 nights there. I am really looking forward to see 'pondan siam'. "MASAJ! MASAJ! EXTRA SERBIS 30 BAHT!" haha! auww! Insyallah, with great companion, nothing would go wrong! yeah!

My initial plan, is to stay at Grand Plaza hotel. Unfortunately, the hotel is fully booked! so I have to find another hotel! hotel Cap Ayam tak mau! I dont want my good night sleep will be interrupted with "MASAJ! MASAJ!" hoha! Now I am looking for another hotel! hope It will be ok! yeah!

We are going to either a) drive to Hatyai. or b) take a cab to Hatyai from Padang Besar! This is yet to be confirmed. Either way, we are going to calculate the budget and we are going to make sure that it will go smoothly! My ex-boss said that 'it is not advisable, but doable!" so.. I will do it!

Hatyai! please get ready! I am going to runsack you!

Blurbing: Part 1- intro, exam, plus capik!

2011-04-25T18:49:00.002+10:00

Look! they are wearing uniform!

Please be informed that I wrote while invigilating! Please read coz I m too damn lazy to change its language structure. So just make do with it k! huhu! enjoy!!

Hola! i am invigilating and seriously I am bored. There are so many things I want to blurb about. I am pretty sure that after this, I will be doing something else. So, while I am having 'free time' and so much of ideas to blurn about, may I as well write them all here.

I am not sure lah how this system yang suddenly, drastically nak all students to answer their exam in English. to tell you the truth, ni dalam sesi ni, I have become a translator. i have to translate all therms to students. gosg! Not to say that it is a bad move, and I am not capable in doing so, but this thing happens drastically. Pity these students. They are not ready yet. Just imagine, all the terms were taught in Malay, and suddenly in exam, all those terms are being presented in English. Terbeliak mata diorang. Luckily I am an English language expert (Ehem2x! lalalala!) so, I manage to help them here and there. But, to the policy maker, please consider many influential factors before deciding to implement anything ya! This is HUGE man! Pity these students. They are in their last sem. If they kantoi, habislah. So please think twice K!

OMG! Dont let me talk about my current health status. I m now, today, officially declare that I am an OKU! huhu! Yup! it has been 2 days now. My leg! oh my! My leg! I am capik aka crippled. Hope it will recover ASAP since my Hatyai and Perlis trip is just around the corner. Yeah!

Will be contnued very-very soon! in part 2

Open Your Eyes

2011-03-21T12:13:00.004+11:00

This cool calming song is meant for those who are in search of the right path; to those who are still lost and want things to regain and become better. It is meant for everyone. What ever happens, just remember Allah would never turn their back on you. Just pray and pray some more. HE will listen to all. Day and night. Allah is great.

Allah please make me happy and show me the right path. Subhanallah. You are great.

I have been happy these few days and let it be forever. I dont want to be sad no more. Allah grand all my prayers, make everything ok, to me, to my parents, my family, my beloved brother, my friend, and all muslim all over the world. Grand us peace and success.

Dear Allah. TQ.

Enjoy this song and get its meaning. So beautiful.

Look around yourselves

Can’t you see this wonder

Spreaded infront of you

The clouds floating by

The skies are clear and blue

Planets in the orbits

The moon and the sun

Such perfect harmony
Let’s start question in ourselves

Isn’t this proof enough for us
Or are we so blind

To push it all aside..No..
We just have to

Open our eyes, our hearts, and minds

If we just look bright to see the signs

We can’t keep hiding from the truth

Let it take us by surprise

Keep us close to You

Until the end of time..
Look inside yourselves

Take us in the best way(Allah..)

Guide us every single day..(Allah..)

Such a perfect order

Hiding in yourselves

Running in your vein

what about anger love and pain

all the things you’re feeling

Can you touch them with your hand?

So are they really there?
Lets start question in ourselves

Isn’t this proof enough for us?

Or are we so blind

To push it all aside..? No..
We just have to

Open our eyes, our hearts, and mind

If we just look bright to see the signs

We can’t keep hiding from the truth

Let it take us by surprise

Take us in the best way(Allah..)

Guide us every single day..(Allah..)

Keep us close to You

Until the end of time..
When a baby’s born

So helpless and weak

And you’re watching him growing..

So why deny

Whats in front of your eyes

The biggest miracle of life..
We just have to

Open our eyes, our hearts, and minds

If we just look quiet we’ll see the signs

We can’t keep hiding from the truth

Let it take us by surprise

Take us in the best way(Allah..)

Guide us every single day..(Allah..)

Keep us close to You

Until the end of time..
Open your eyes and hearts and minds

If you just look bright to see the signs

We can’t keep hiding from the truth

Let it take us by surprise

Take us in the best way(Allah..)

Guide us every single day..(Allah..)

Keep us close to You

Until the end of time..
Allah..You created everything

We belong to You

Ya Robb we raise our hands

Forever we thank You..Alhamdulillah..
Artist: Maher ZainAlbum: Thank You AllahCopyright: Awakening Records 2009

Dear Mommy...

2011-03-11T17:27:00.002+11:00

Assalamualaikum mak

Mak.. dah setahun mak pergi. Tapi kami masih belum dapat nak lepaskan mak dengan mudah.

Mak...

Kami rindu mak. Sangat-sangat.

*I have a lot to write about this post, but I just cant hold it. Drops of tears are streaming down.

I m facing my tough time again. I m seriously lost.

exploded!

2011-02-14T15:06:00.003+11:00

*sigh*

I couldn't take it anymore when dealing with unmotivated students. We planned so many things and then it turned out they didn't even appreciate it.

today I exploded in the class and left 15 mins early 'coz I know if I prolong my stay there, I will definitely swear to them! Gosh! They are not motivated to learn at all. Didn't pay attention and didn't even serious in class.

I had great time last sem handling the same module, but this sem, the students are so.., LAZY and UNMOTIVATED!

Just imagine, there are 32 students and only 10 are willing to buy the dictionary. And the rest just share with each other! Gosh! they are really testing me. How can they study in such? The dictionary is their text book, the main material for their class. But they don't even have one. they share! Gosh! I still remember last week that I inform them earlier that they need to use their dictionary in the weeks to come, but they didn't respond.

Today, 6 students share a dictionary! So how are they going to learn in such situation.

Argh! I m pissed off and YES! ITS MONDAY!!!! F**K!!!!!!

just wanna say.......

2011-02-12T18:41:00.001+11:00

TEKANAN!!!!!!

Secret VS Suprise

2011-02-10T14:10:00.003+11:00

Wassup? I m doing good. What about you? I hope that you would be in the pinkest of health.

I m going to attend a battle, really-really soon. So please pray for me ya since I have nobody to turn to and ask them to pray for me, so I hope you (my dear fair blog surfers) would pray for me, who ever you are. It is not easy to be me. I have to face many battles. Some I have won, but some are still uncertain. Yup, alone I would face them all since I have nobody to turn to.

Ok. Somebody hates me for a suprise which I kept for a few days. That person said that I love to keep secret. And I do think that is the reason why that person hates me so much. I kept the thing from that person as for a suprise, but the person sees it differently.

I think it is of a good intention if i were to keep a secret for a while and later make it as a suprise. This would be a good way to shock others. The case here is somewhat similar to planning for a suprise birthday party. It wouldnt be great if the targetted person would know that we are planning to suprise him or her in that party. It wont be a suprise anymore. When you bought something, and you keep it in your closet as not to let others know you have bought it is a good example of a suprise secret, and I do think there is nothing wrong in doing so. So I do think that the person who planned for the suprise shouldnt be blamed for his intention to do so. Like buying a new car. You wouldnt let the world know that you are buying a new car since if the world knows, it wouldnt be a suprise anymore. People would view you as a boastful. Do you want that to happen?

Dont you like suprises? It would be great if you suddenly see somebody and he suprise you for something. This would be an element of suprise. The act of punishing somebody for his intention to suprise somebody is so unacceptable. you should love him, NOT hate him!

So, to that person out there, stop punishing others if his or her intention is to suprise you. You should thank him or her for doing so cause at least you can experience the suprise. He meant you no harm and he did no sin. What about you?

Forgive me. Thanks!

SMS at 4.44 a.m!!!

2011-02-02T11:59:00.004+11:00

(This is Saipul Afzan - during his active years)

I received an sms at 4.44 am today informing me that *Saipul Afzan Bin Ghafar (a colleague that I got to know when I worked at Kulim) passed away after suffering from viral infection.

I was a indeed a wake up call. I still remember him being an active person where he would lead students to do 'senamrobik' and all. He is into choir too. I still remember how I hated the way he dressed especially his long and pointy shoes.

Anyway, that was not the reason why I finally (after longgggg absence) start yadda-yaddaing here in my blog. Let us talk about death@ departure and how people can change in just a swift!

Death:
This is the thing that I m scared of.

Departure:
A state which we would have to face several times in a lifetime. I hate departures! I hate saying goodbye. I just hate it SO much!

Change:
Transformation process that we have to endure. Change your hairstyle. Change your car. Change your attitude. Change job.. etc etc. Some change for good, but some would be the opposite. It would be great if the change (for good) is for real and for sure. What if the change is just temporary? Like changing a flat tyre and later it will puncture again. and like changing your t-shirt after a very sweaty workout and later you continue on working out? What if it is just an act just to mock around? Like when you change your good natured attitude just to ensure that somebody that you hate would 'termakan cili'? What if people put their two faced mask and pretend? Like when you are with your bosses. You act as if you are an angel in front of him / her and later you put your horns back? All this questions haunt me. I do hope that it is not just a tell-tale that I have heard all this while. and obviously boooorriiiiiinngggg~

Anyway, back to the sms that I received earlier today. Did you realize that I received that sms at 4.44 am? According to Chinese beliefs, '4' is a very nasty number since the pronounciation of the word sounds like 'die!' And Chinese would try to avoid having no 4 (car reg number etc) in their life @ businesses. So, that sms is a shocker. But Anyway, since I m not a Chinese, so I dont give a damn about all those things. It is just a coincidence! huhu! merely a coincidence.

I have a lot of things to write. But I m too damn lazy to be sitting in front of the PC and type my heart out! I M A PRODUCTIVE PERSON! get it??

*Anyway Al-Fatihah to him. May Allah bless him.
hehe. trudalooooo!

I hate goodbyes!

2010-11-11T14:39:00.005+11:00

Dear All

Sem ni mmg banyak cabaran aku hadapi, tp aku dah jadi stronger due to all these challenges. Becoming 30 is not as easy as I thought and it is indeed not as difficult or daunting as i have imagined - or may be i dont really savour its taste yet?.

Yes. As I am now 30 i go out more. I rarely spend time at home alone. I would prefer to just walk blankly or just do some window shopping. FYI.. i would always do such masa early 20s dulu. As time passes, i got bored and i just drifted away.

hmm... lately I draw myself closer to my students. Yup. I m enjoying myself in my classes. Among them all, there are 5 students which have become close to me.

Last night, since they are all going home today, they called me just to hang out with me. Well.. it has been years since I last hangnout with students. Some of my ex students which have become close to me would include Yazid and my bro Fendi. They were my friends when I was in Kulim.

Now, this sem, I have got 5 new 'friends'. Last night went to Kambeng, ate there. They wanted to treat me. haha. Pity them, i wanted them to celebrate the ending of their sem 1, but unfortunately i have forgotten that they dont have $$. So, I didnt order much. let them eat. After that, took them to watch movie. It was an awesome movie and they did say that it was good to end the sem that way. I treated them movie tics. We were a bit late. Pak guard didnt let them enter, so I took them home. They slept at my place.

Today, just now, they came to see me. i thought they wanted to borrow my car since they are going to move from their hostel to their new rental. But I was wrong. They came to see me just to say goodbye. I was.... touched. Indeed. They said they wont be seeing me for 3 weeks. And they indeed want to spend more time with me next sem. Well guys! Sure! let us go somewhere and enjoy! I was planning to take them to Sedim. Insyallah. They have also offered me to come to their place and stay at theirs. Insyallah. I have to prob, just that I m not sure when will be going to their places. But who knows...

Among them, there is this chatty and kuat merapu one. Hakim. He helped me to mark my exam papers. haha. I was so busy so I asked his help.

But.. on top of all, I m really bad at departure. I dont know how to act and what to do. I would always want to skip the 'goodbye' session. Coz to me, goodbye is like the ending of everything. So I refuse to bid farewell to anybody. So just now, I didnt know what to do when they purposely came to my office just to bid goodbye. *Sigh* I can impress people with my social skill but it is really hard for me to attend departures.

I still remember, these are 5 students which I scolded a few months back for coming late to my class. These are the students which I asked to sit outside of the class. haha. Funny. yet now they draw closer to me.

They are on their way home now. Yup guys! thanks for the treat and thanks for the laughter. Hakim, Zaid, Zul, Rashid and Zabir see you next sem... in one piece ya.

Sharing is caring...

2010-11-02T15:50:00.004+11:00

LA TAHZAN (Dont be sad!) by Dr 'Aidh bin 'Abdullah Al-Qarni is indeed an inspirational book. I can keep on and on and on quoting his words. Here I share some which have made me become more forgiving and cool. Remember how bad people made you feel, just believe that Allah is there for you.

So here some worth sharing quotes...

"Sesungguhnya emosi yang tidak terkendali hanya akan meletihkan. Sebab, ketika seseorang sedang marah misalnya, maka kemarahannya akan meluap dan sukar dikendalikan. Dan itu akan membuat seluruh tubuhnya gementar, mudah memaki siapa sahaja, seluruh hatinya tertumpah ruah, dan akan cenderung bertindak mengikut nafsunya. Sekiranya dia mengalami kegembiraan, dia menikmatinya secara berlebihan, mudah lupa diri dan tak ingat lagi siapa dirinya"

"Begitulah manusia; ketika sedang bermusuh dengan seseorang, dia cenderung megherdik dan mencelanya, dan melupakn seluruh kebaikan orang yang tidak dia sukai itu begitu sahaja. Demikian pula ketika dia menyukai orang lain, dia akan segera melupakan kekurangannya, bahkan orang itu akan terus di a puja dan sanjung setinggi-tingginya seolah tiada cacat celanya."

"Cintailah sesuatu yang kamu cintai sekadar sahaja, kerana biasa jadi suatu hari nanti ia akan menjadi sesuatu yang kamu benci; dan bencilah sesuatu yang kamu benci sekadarnya sahaja, kerana biasa jadi suatu hari nanti ia akan menjadi sesuatu yang kamu cintai"

"Barangsiapa mampu mengawal emosinya, mengendalikan aqalnya dan menimbang segalanya dengan benar, maka ia akan mudah melihat kebenaran, mengetahui petunjuk dan memutuskan sesuatu dengan benar"

" Jangan kau salahkan orang merindu dengan kerinduannya sehingga kau mampu menyelami jiwanya"

So do question yourself why such thing happened to you. Everything happens for a reason. :)

Photos and their stories...

2010-11-01T16:23:00.004+11:00

I had to drink lots of this just to make sure that the stone in my kidney would be dissolved.

This was the report made by the doctor. I also found out that I have an abnormal kidney. hehe. I am abnormal and I do think that I deserve OKU card. hehe.

I was asked to wear this for my MRI scan. They put me through a doughnut with very beautiful moving lights. Suddenly the nurse said "Saya tak biasa pakai benda ni!" I was WTF??? hehe. I survived the radiation. I do think that now I am a mutant! X-MEN here I come!

Look at this cat! I bro owns this cat! It looks so fierce and brutal. But in reality he is a coward. Scared even to get out of the house. But look at him. so AUMMM!!! but actually meow meow!

I was so stressed out, so I went for a facial relaxation treatment. It consisted of several courses. a) Enzime treatment. B) Diamond treatment C) rejuvenating treatment. The person who did this to me was so cute. Felt like taking that amoi home. She is actually from my kampong and she has been working for this premise for several months. I will DEFINITELY see her again. Amoi!!!! Amoi cantik! Amboi!!!

A gallery restaurant at Jitra which serves expensive Tomyam. Hehe. I tried it once and the taste of its tomyam is similar to the restaurant's near my house.

I stayed at this hotel. Cosy but cheap. My ex-students are working here too. Lousy breakfast. Hard bed, yet ok for its price. I was ok for a day. Then when the swearing occurred, I felt like burning the hotel down even though it was not its fault and it had nothing to do with it. Remember: you may swear to other people and felt nothing about it. Just wait until one day somebody swear at you, at you would 'taste' it yourself. Best of luck!

This was the thing that I ate at RFC, Jitra.

The burger was OK. Organic.. mind you!

Love the chicken, I didnt feel 'muak' eating it since it is organic. Less fat and no yucky feeling.

I ate this ice cream when I was in Jitra. Yup! I went to RFC or Radix Fried Chicken. 100% halal fastfood outlet. But trust me, I didnt have enough. The chicken was different since they were organically breed.

This is RFC. As you can see, it is opened under HPA Sdn Bhd, a muslim owned franchaise.

I decorated my mum's house with this, that night, just to kill time since that house was so quiet. I did this.

This one too. I was imagining my mum in the kitchen cooking for me that night. But, obviously, she was not around.

Pity this kitty. He had been following me. I couldnt keep him since I was on my way to Jitra. Pity him. He is now nowhere to be found.

We ate this! wuhuhuhuhu! Delish!

Pamper myself with fish spa! I love going to spa lately! pamper myself! I m 30 and definitely I m happy!

Doctor forbits me from eating seafood. Anis, Ili, Jaja and a friend asked me to join them for CRAB session. Gosh! Delish! Ate 2 crabs and got rashes after that. Nevermind. Life is too great to be wasted.

My wall looks crowded eh? need to do something about it.

My trip to kl with my bro during Ramadhan.

I m 30, I m busy BUT I m happy

2010-10-28T13:12:00.004+11:00

Salam. It has been ages since my last post. Well I guess, now I m back. I have so many to spill about. About my bday, about courses that I handled, about my health, about this about that. But in all I would say that turning 30 is not a bad thing after all. I m much happier now. Things have got back to normal me. I was lost for a while, but now I m ok. I m the usual me. I was lost for nearly 2 years. Now... I back. The old Zack is back. Yes! I would want it to be that way.

How I wish I could spill everything here, but I just cant. maybe.. MAYBE in my other blog... somewhere.... you can read all about it. haha. But DEFINITELY not here. huhu.

My new hobby now is reading. My friend recommended me to read Dont Be Sad by Dr 'Aidh bin Abdullah Al-Qarni. I bought the book and still am reading it. It is so inspirational. I found this quote, which I think worth sharing...

"Wahai masa lalu yang telah berlalu dan selesai, tenggelamlah seperti mataharimu. Aku tak akan pernah menangisi pemergianmu, dan kamu tidak akan pernah melihatku termenung sedetik pun untuk mengingatimu. kamu telah meninggalkan kami semua pergi dan tidak akan kembali"

"Wahai masa depan, engkau masih dalam keghaiban! Maka aku tidak akan pernah bermain dengan khayalan dan menjual diri hanya untuk sebuah dugaan. Aku pun tidak bakal memburu sesuatu yang belum tentu ada, kerana esok hari mungkin tidak ada sesuatu; esok hari adalah sesuatu yang belum diciptakan dan tidak ada satu pun darinya yang dapat disebutkan"

"Hari ini adalah milikmu"

There are many more. I got 2 batik bookmarks as my bday present, so I use them wisely.

FB? It has been 2 weeks since I last logged on to it. I dont know why I suddenly feel so lazy to use it! For now I think I would prefer to be lost in books. I will get back to my FB really soon. I do miss Latip and Kyuti, but I will get back to them later.

A cat peed on my shoes. Shit! I need to buy a new pair of shoes. Damn! (~_~)"

Luckily Jusco sale in on and Parkson too. So... shoppinggggg time~!!!

The old zack is back. And he is here to stay!..

da~

a special wish

2010-09-20T01:08:00.002+10:00

all the best to him and indeed he is my brother.

soothing song for Ramadhan.

2010-08-13T12:11:00.002+10:00

Assalamualaikum

Do listen to this song. It is so soothing. Listen to the acoustic version. This is just its temporary video link. I will post the real one soon. Adik, listen to this. No excuse!!!!!

Maher Zain - Thank You Allah - New Album Advert
Uploaded by mucan63. - Explore more music videos.

Thank You Allah Lyrics
By: Maher Zain

I was so far from you
Yet to me you were always so close
I wandered lost in the dark
I closed my eyes toward the signs
You put in my way
I walked everyday
Further and further away from you
Ooooo Allah, you brought me home
I thank You with every breath I take.
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.
I never thought about
All the things you have given to me
I never thanked you once
I was too proud to see the truth
And prostrate to you
Until I took the first step
And that’s when you opened the doors for me
Now Allah, I realized what I was missing
By being far from you.
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.
Allah, I wanna thank You
I wanna thank you for all the things that you’ve done
You’ve done for me through all my years I’ve been lost
You guided me from all the ways that were wrong
And did you give me hope
O Allah, I wanna thank you
I wanna thank You for all the things that you’ve done
You’ve done for me through all my years I’ve been lost
You guided me from all the ways that were wrong
I wanna thank You for bringing me home
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.

the bizzare case Of chicken pox

2010-08-12T15:37:00.004+10:00

Salam. It is finally here. Ramadhan. Yes. I feel more relax and enjoying the trueness of fasting. Yup! Indeed.

Well, there have been so many things I want to post here, just that I am not sure whether on not I have got the time to write. Let me start with chicken pox. Hoho.

Chicken pox

Last 3 weeks, when I was in Bukit Hijau (for a tiring and troublesome English Camp), I received some smses from my lil bro. From the smses I got to now that something was not OK. He kept on asking when I will be out of the 'jungle'. I could sense something bad was on. The line there, in the jungle, was so terrible. I had to find the right spot just to send 1 sms. My bro, however, received several smses from me, I mean the same sms but several times. So I guess, celcom was 'razorblading' me for that.

My bro asked me several times about my stay there at that jungle. I know him every well, if he wants to ask something, his mukaddimah would be long and winding. Only then he would spill out his intention. So being him, the normal him, I can sense, he wanted to ask something. And finally, I got an sms from him telling me that he had been diagnosed with chicken pox. Gosh! there was no other word that I could say, just that, "take a bus home immediately!"

I had chicken pox before and I know it is kind of tedious work just to have one. First of all there would be so many no-nos. Among them would include
A)DO NOT FRY ANYTHING IN THE HOUSE
B)DO NOT EXPOSE YOURSELF TO RAIN ( actually I have 1 big scar on my chest because of this. A rain fell onto my chest, and the chicken pox had become big, and now the scar is like somebody who has had an operation before. I used to brag about this scar by saying that " I was shot, and the bullet stuck here. But I survived" hehe)
C) DONT LOOK INTO MIRROR. if not the 'poxes' would become shy and they would 'drown' themselves back.
D)DO NOT TAKE OILY FOOD.
E)DO NOT TAKE SEAFOOD AND OTHER 'ITCHY FOOD'
but the most ridiculous of all....
F) DO NOT LET CHICKEN SEE YOU. what? What is the rationale behind this? I xknow. hehe

... then on Sunday, after coming out from the jungle, I went to fetch my bro at Bworth bus station. Yes.. I was kind of shocked to see him. His face was full of 'spots'. I dared not say much. But there was no smile at all on his face. So, obviously he was not enjoying himself at all, well who would.

It was drizzling. I was worried to see him walk in the drizzle, I was trying to get an umbrella, but it was to late, he walked rather fast. He entered the car, and no word came out from his mouth. He didn't even shake my hand. So, to play save, I held my tongue.

I have got some experience in taking care of chicken pox patient before. My late mom had chicken pox just a few months before she left us. So, I took care of her for several days. But hers was not as bad as my bro's. We are talking about big poxes here. But, I didn't mind. All I know, I must help him recover since ramadhan is getting near, and he needs to go back to seremban to continue with his study. With that condition, I didnt think it would be the best for him to stay at his hostel. Knowing him, he would not ask help from people. So, with that pox, I didnt think he would be asking his roommate to go out and buy food for him. So, that was why I ORDERED him to come home. And thank god, he did!

In helping him to recover, the main thing that I must focus on was his food. To ensure that he got 'permissible' food, I cooked for him. haha. Just imagine. for two weeks I cooked at home. And now, I do think that I have become a good cook. He could not eat well since he got poxes on his inner throat. So, he had to take porridge and soft food (just like a baby) wuhuhu.. After a few days, no more porridge for him. After nearly two weeks, he finally got better and last Sunday, he went back to seremban. there goes the pox guy! haha.

What I learn from this experience:

Not just learning to become a good cook (ahem ahem) I also learn to be patient. It is not easy though to juggle between work and household chores. I had to go to work, then ran home, cooked, then this and that. Luckily he managed to do all the things oh his own. If he is a small kid, I was pretty sure to die. At nights, he couldn't sleep. There would be numerous time, I woke out finding him using neem leaves to ease the itchiness that he had. Pity him. If he is a small boy, I m pretty sure he would be crying!. It also helped me to be more responsible. All this while, all that I care (well most of the time) would be myself. From the experience, I help myself to be more reliable. Taking care of sick person is not easy. There were several times I was badly hurt (I mean, emotionally, but I do hope it was not done intentionally. If yes.. SCREW YOU BRO!!), but come to think about it as a test for my patience, so I managed to get along with it. But for those out there, please... DO NOT USE SWEAR WORDS! It DOES NOT feel good at all!

After this chicken pox thingy, I m reevaluating myself. Can I be a good brother? Husband? Father? Am I ready to face all the responsibilities that are waiting for me ahead? Do I have what it takes to be a responsible person? How good would I be in handling others? but on top of all, AM I QUALIFIED TO HOLD ALL THOSE TITLES?

I m still asking myself the question.

Thanks to all my friends that had helped in giving information this and that. It feels really bad when there is no mom around to provide you with all the info when you need them. So I do miss my mom, her appearance, a lot. But, she did a very good job. Because of her I know all the things that I know now. So thank you MAK for all the things that you showed me, and taught me. You will always be the QUEEN OF MY HEART.

So bro... get 100% well soon, so that you can enjoy your satay for this coming Raya. Don't worry so much about those scars as they will disappear, sooner or later. Thanks for believing in me, and thanks for giving me the chance to experience how to handle chicken pox patient. Sorry, if I didn't manage to cater your taste buds and didn't be the best 'nurse' in taking care of you.

All in all, thanks bro..

sigh........ -_-

2010-07-15T15:55:00.001+10:00

Well. I was happy last week, but today suddenly another test is here for me to face. I m sick of this kind of test, but, what to to. It's Allah's plan. So, I need to withstand it and face it.

Support me please.

I m finding my comfort

2010-07-02T13:11:00.002+10:00

As I posted earlier, my mind is not at ease these 2-3 days. The feeling of something not good is going to happen is haunting me. I m trying to comfort myself by listening to some zikr and the recitation of Quran. I realize nobody would be there for me except Allah. So there's no other power can help me and ease the burden that I feel. Got another meltdown last night. I am weak. I m weak. To Allah I turn hoping for His help and guidance. Today, I found Maher Zain songs in my pc music playlist. I m trying to find my comfort from Allah. Ya Allah, do help.

My heart cried while listening to this song.

Allah. Please help me.

Insyallah
Maher Zain

Everytime you feel like you cannot go on
You feel so lost
That your so alone
All you is see is night
And darkness all around
You feel so helpless
You can`t see which way to go
Don`t despair and never loose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side

Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way

Everytime you can make one more mistake
You feel you can`t repent
And that its way too late
Your`re so confused,wrong decisions you have made
Haunt your mind and your heart is full of shame

Don`t despair and never loose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way

Turn to Allah
He`s never far away
Put your trust in Him
Raise your hands and pray
OOO Ya Allah
Guide my steps don`t let me go astray
You`re the only one that showed me the way,
Showed me the way 2x
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah we`ll find the way

Ya Allah...Rasa itu kembali

2010-07-01T16:54:00.005+10:00

I can sense something I dont approve, I dont like, is going to happen.

Sudah 2-3 minggu aku sangat gembira. jadi aku harap aku dapat terus gembira. Tolonglah... Ya Allah.

Kepada orang yang sangat penting dalam hidup aku, jagalah apa yang kita ada sebaiknya. Ianya sangat menyeronokkan. Aku rasa sangat bahagia. Aku harap kamu juga sama. Jangan lah terjadi dan diulangi perkara yang tidak diingini lagi. Aku tidak mahu semuanya hilang. Aku mahu semuanya ada sehingga aku menutup mata.

Aku berdoa...

Ya Allah. Aku mahu terus gembira.

What I have learned from Toys....

2010-06-28T12:04:00.007+10:00

howdy folks...

Yup! I am in my office and I have tonnes of works to be completed, but I m just not in the mood to do it.. just yet.

Emotionally, I m getting better. After a terrible 'meltdown' which I faced a few weeks ago, now everything seems to be controllable. I hope I will get better... better and greater.

Well, there are so many things which I m thinking of blurbing about. As for today, I would like to share things which I think would be beneficial! Well, at least after reading this entry, some of you would like to go and watch the movie. Yup! i am talking about TOY STORY 3.

I watched it last week with my bro. We had actually had a terrible experience the first time where the screening was cancelled after the first 15 minutes it was on. We were so dissappointed. But if it did continue, I dont think I would be enjoying it to the fullest like how I did last Saturday. So, to cut the story short, GSC refunded my money and we were given 2 complimentary passes for free movie screening. Yeah! We used the first pass, and we still have one more. I will wait for my bro to redeem it.

Hmm... TOY STORY 3 was an awesome experience. I nearly cried, but.. nah! I didnt! akeke. I was emotionally involved with the storyline and the characters. If I would choose a character to represent who I am, i would claim myself as Woody - the cowboy.

Now, what I really learn from Toy Story 3? Here it goes...

Andy!

These toys keep on repeating "we are going to serve Andy". It is kind of sad to think that Andy does not really need them anymore, but they keep on saying that. They even plan to be there for Andy and his children. The initial part, shows that these Toys are longing for Andy's attention since Andy is now a teen and he doesnt play with his toys anymore. These toys are kept in a chest in Andy's bedroom. Just to get his attention, these toys stole Andy's cellphone and made a miscall just to make Andy realise that they are still there. Their plan did work, but Andy is not interested to play with 'em anymore. It can be seen clearly how dissappointed these toys are. Rex, was so happy that Andy did touch him since he was the one with the cellphone.. huhu. They are so loyal.

The fact that they are toys and they are being played does not hinder them from being there for Andy. Even though there are being thrown away, being kicked, being given a mean bad character, but they just dont care since their mission is to serve Andy. They are being played, but their loyalty is still intact. Their mission, they want others to be happy. Even others dont need them, they still insist to be there, for others. :(

These toys are not sure on what lies for them in the future. They realise that Andy would never play with them anymore, so they were thinking of what to do or what might happen to them in the future. There are some preassumptions;

a) they will be kept in the attict.

b) they will be donated.

c) they will be thrown away as RUBBISH.

They wish that they will get the first option since it would be less tormenting. According to them, it would be ok to stay in the attict and have the time of their own. Even though they are not going to be played with, but at least they can be together and hopefully, one day, Andy would open their box and let his children play with them. Hopefully....! They were trying to say good things about the attict. They are talking about how good it is to stay there in the attict together with other things like Christmat tree decor etc etc. But in reality, they know that their life wouldnt be the same since, their role will diminish. They will be old and weary toys, Unkept, not needed and unplayed. :(

Second option would be ok, they will still be played, but they are not sure on what will happen to them. Where are they going to be donated? How the other children will treat them etc etc. If their new owner is kind enough, they will be treated well. But.. what if.... it is the opposite? hmm.. Life is so uncertain.

Lastly, they dont want to be thrown away as rubbish. Who would? So, we as human also dont want to be seen as rubbish. To be thrown away, and be kept as 'rubbish' and waiting for the right time to be decayed. It hurts. So I could feel them. :(

There toys really reflect reality. Its about how we should continue on living. When we lost something, we should keep on walking and continue on. Plan ahead and whatever might happen we might face them. Loyalty is the key thing here. Even if you think that you are not needed anymore, you must keep to your own role. What might happen, what will happen, nothing is going to change. Appreciate those who would be dear to us, who needs us. ... erm erm erm..

It hurts so much when your role is being replaced by others.

Yup! There is this one character in TOY STORY 3 (the pink bear -i cant recall his name) where he felt unneeded and he has become a villain. He used to be hugged, kissed and loved. Until one day, he and a couple of friend were left behind, accidently. They were trying very hard to get back to the one that is so dear to them, but their effort seem useless when finally, they realise that their role has been given or taken away by someone else, another toy. They had finally become evil and true smile has dissappeared since then. It feels really bad when what used to be yours is being taken away. It cuts deep. So. I would never do that! Insyallah. Dont "bila dapat gading bertuah, tanduk tidak berguna lagi!"

yadda yadda..

There are actually lots more. I just dont have much time to put them here. But I would recommend you to watch it. I m thinking of watching it again. Do pay attention to the last part. It means a lot. Look at those toys faces when finally Andy played with them for the last time before he departs to college. They look fullfilled and satisfied since they have been longing for his touch. I nearly cried to watch that part. They are toys, they are being played but its ok, as long as they can serve people. So , go and watch TOY STORY 3, and try to feel them and dig deep the meaning of each of their statement and of course from the storyline. Please go and enjoy the movie k.

TOY STORY 3........ I give 4.5 stars since I nearly cried. huhuhuhu...

ps: I was chucked several times by my bro. but he was wrong, I didnt fall asleep. Toy Story 3 is too beautiful to be missed.

.................................................................................. end ..........................................................................

I m not OK today

2010-05-25T13:58:00.003+10:00

Not in a very good mood today. (since 2 days ago, actually!) Feel so lonely, and it feels worse than before.

What has become of me. I smsed my dear friend, Ab, and told him how I feel. According to him, it is normal. it is what he refers to as early 30's syndrom. He has passed that age long ago. I guess I need to see him so that I can get some tips on how to overcome that sydrome once in for all. HOw I wish, he is here.

I do realize now that I m not an independant guy anymore. But now, i would say that I have become a very dependant guy. I would always crave for company. If before I would go watch movie alone, but now, I just cant. id rather stay home if I have no company. And to tell you the truth, I have no company here, in penang. Everybody seems busy with their own business and I m too damn lazy to go out and make new friends. Yes, I m bored to death.

Once in a while I would contact my bro, but he is busy with his life too and I shouldnt bother him too much - eventhough I want him to accompany me, but I must face the fact that he has his own life.

.......................................................................

I was assigned as the invigilator today. That class looked so annoying. I hated that class so much! Even for invigilation, but there was something -ve about that class. The students looked rather arrogant. One of them was swearinng terribly to i dont know who. But certainly, that class had.... an eerie look. So I hope next sem I will not be asked to teach them.

......................................................................

My bro called me as cekeding since I m a bit skinny. It is not my choice to be skinny. It is not good at all. I cant wear most of my shirts, pants and jeans. Even if i wear them, I would have bulges here and there. It is not good at all.

.....................................................................

there are many things i would want to write, but... I just dont feel OK.. hmm...

hey you! I LOVE YOU!! can you hear me?

T_T

of me and my dot dot dot life..

2010-05-13T12:24:00.003+10:00

Woho! I m so damn old now. huhu! last nite went to watch movie. Ironman and Crazies. Nak tahu tak... Ironman tu aku tak tengok pun! Aku just duduk dalam cinema and tido. haha! So i paid rm5 just untuk dapatkan ekon. Aku akan terjaga sekali sekala bila my bro 'menyiku' kan aku. Itu la fungsi dia kalau tgk movie ngan aku, dia akan 'sikukan' aku kalau dia rasa aku tidak bergerak. haha! maka aku pun akan terjaga, untuk seketika, dan tido semula. Dia akan sikukan semula, pastu aku terjaga, aku sikukan dia (revenge!!) pastu aku tido semula.

Well.. that is who I have become. I usually could stand movie marathon, 5 movies in a row, but now, satu movie pun aku dah tido. And banyak plak kenangan kat dalam cinema. Terlanggar tiang la, stoking berbau la, tgk horror movie dalam cinema kosong la.. mcm2. Tapi semalam, for sure, aku terjaga bila dengar letupan kat screen je, yang selainnya, yang aku ingat cumalah aku disiku, kepala ku terlentok ke minah disebelah (bersama bf dia yang sangat sihat!!) selainnya aku cuma nampak ironman terbang macam pondan. haha. pastu meletup pongpang pongpang, last skali lampu terpasang. So sangat berbaloi bayar RM5. pastu masa The Crazies, mmg aku terjaga, tapi menjelang 1/4 terakhir aku rasa sangatletih, sangat letih, dan letih... dan klekuk!!! aku kena siku lagi! huhu. haha.. pastu aku terjaga sampai abis.. lalalala

skarng ni nak g memana dah senang dah coz aku dah ada driver. tak sabar la aku nak hand over stereng tu pada dia agar aku bleh tido. Lambatnya rasa dia nak dapat lesen. Dia dah boleh bawak kreta, just dia teragak2 je lagi. Tak lama lagi tu, terer la tu. wuhuhu. skrang ng jadi masalah ialah kat bulatan dan kat traffic light. Dia selalu pindah lorong masa kat tengah simpang. Itu agak berbahaya juga coz kereta selalunya akan kejar lampu hijau, so takut nanti, tak ternampak... kebabow plak. tapi takpa, teringat plak masa aku memula drive dulu. Mind you, aku tak pernah pegang stereng selain stereng keta memandu. Blejar, belajar, belajar.. akhirnya den dapat. Walaupun aku dapat lesen kete hanya pada umur 23, tapi ok la. and the best part is, aku beli kereta apa semua, semua aku uruskan sendri. Orang lain tak amik kesah pun. So skrang kalau orang tanya kenapa dulu masa beli kerete ko tak itu ini itu ini.. aku dia je. dorang tak tahu yang masa aku beli keta dulu aku haram apa pun tak tau pasal kreta. and masa nak bawa keta balik umah tu, hanya Allah je yang tahu, betapa takutnya aku. Semua buat sorang. nak ajak orng itu, orng ini semua busy. last2 aku g je sendiri. huhu.. dapat juga kete aku ni.

ok... tadi aku tereksiden bawa dvd gegambo aku ke opis. walaupun keja banyak, tapi aku terpanggil untuk buka gegambo tu. aksi2 aku dan kawan2 ku yang aku chentai! wowowowo! I miss you guys la. wowowow

p/s: gambo tidak ada kena mengena dengan post aku ok. huhu!!!

i am special..but I am not THAT special...

2010-05-12T10:02:00.003+10:00

I am special... but I am not THAT special.......

if not... I would know things that other people wouldnt know the thing that I know...

You can hug someone, but you cant ask that person to hug you in return....

Its one free will to do as they wish.... all you can offer is...... your very best!

so...

I am special.... but NOT THAT SPECIAL.....

sad but true....

Y_Y

...of many things that I need and I missed...

2010-05-10T18:23:00.003+10:00

Halo! It has been ages since I last put up something here. I miss blurting some thoughts here. how I wish I can be as "loyal" as Paten in writing her blog. Her blog doesnt only look good, it is entertaining too. You go girl. keep em coming ya!

Ok! First of all, Happy Mother's dDy to all moms out there. Even though I had never wished my mom such, but I would surely call or went home to see her on this special day. However, this year, obviously she is no longer with me, so I couldnt go home and see her. But, I did send my prayers for her, not just on this special day, but everyday. I do hope that Allah would grant my prayer even though I do realise that I have sinned A LOT!. Dear God. I miss her.

Hmm .... last week , I was so busy with my works. Marks are to be keyed in and submitted today. I didnt have enough sleep just to complete all those. I skipped some meals, or at least just grabbed something light. Last week, I had Cheezel and Mocha. Nice!!! owh! How I miss my cuppa (capu in front of the lawn near UNSW library). Busy with works. I m getting skinnier. huhu! it is not somthing that I should proud of!

This week, I m so damn lucky I received a "pemeriksa jemputan". Hehe. He helped me to mark piles of test papers. I m very grateful and thankful that my "pemeriksa jemputan" is willing enough to let all his easy going and enjoyable time go and help me with the markings. I just dont know what to say. I m so damn lucky. I owe him big time.

Last week, eventhough I was so damn busy, but I was happy since I got to know a very special news. My bro is finally working his way with someone special. I m so gald to hear that. My bro is a special one. I would do anything just to make him happy. When I heard about the news, I was just so happy! I smiled all day. You mean a lot to me bro. It would give me heaven just to know that you are happy. And I want you to be happy for real!

There are many things that I would love to spill out here, but just that, some of them are rather inappropriate. I m thinking of opening a new blog where it would be my REAL story where I can just say what I want to say. I hope I would find the courage to do so.

Anyway, I m do damn lucky to have a very supportive brother. You mean a lot to me bro. thanks a mill for what you have done. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

THis week, I m going to have a very special project with DMT. Wait and see. I do hope the project would come true.

Till then...

c ya..

aku dan MACAM MACAM

2010-04-21T11:39:00.003+10:00

kisah 1:

Pagi tadi dlm pejalanan balik dari kelas aku jumpa seorang student lelaki. Dia pakai cekak rambut. Aku tegur.. "wah bagus la awak. Lepas ni jangan lupa masuk Miss World ya!"

Kisah 2:

Aku bangun pagi and tetiba nak cakap I love you, so I cakap I love you pada ramai orang. Sampaikan ada yang terkejut

Kisah 3:

Semalam ingat nak tido awal, tup2 tido lewat gak. dan tido dengan hati yang terluka. kerana aku dapat tahu sesuatu yang sangat melukakan. sampaikan hati tertanya2... adakah aku di..........? ermm..

Kisah 4:

Bangun seawal pukul 6 pagi, cuba masuk pet society tapi gagal. sedih sebab tak dapat jengok latip. Esok mesti encik adik lari dari rumah lagi.

Kisah 5:

Pagi ni semuanya mcm tah.. kosong! selalunya parking space kat bawah umah tu penuh, pagi ni semua licin.. huh! aku lambat ka?

Kisah 6:

Dapat sms good night. Happy! tapi......

Kisah 7:

Smalam g Carefour. Cadang nak bli tissue je, bila balik, tgk2 berlambak pulak aku beli.

Kisah 8:

Telefon kakak sulungku, dia menangis kat telefon coz dia rindu mak!

Kisah 9:

Rasa nak call sesorang tapi takut tak dijawab.. so.. duduk diam2!

Kisah 9:

hari ni ada meeting. Rasa nak buli student untuk gantung banner.

Kisah 10:

Perut sangat lapar. takde geng nak makan dengan aku. Rasa mcm lonely plak.

Kisah 11:

Sedang makan nasi ayam.

Kisah 12 :

Masih terluka.

Kisah 13:

Tadi jalan ikut belakang PA pengarah! Ya Allah! jalan mcm itik! lambat nak mampos!!! Hish!!

Kisah 14:

Aku rindu!

Kisah 15:

Masih lagi terluka!

Kisah 16:

Bila aku cakap sayang pada A, ianya memang bermakna sayang kerana perkataan sayang itu sangat besar maknanya pada aku.

Kisah 17:

Seronok juga bergosip kat opis. dah berbakul dah dosa aku buat! wuhuhu! aDoyai!!

Kisah 18:

Nasi ayam yang aku makan tak sedap. Tapi lapo.. aku balun jugak le.

Kisah 19:

Aku terluka.

Kisah 20:

Aku sayang kamu. Kamu........? bagaimana?

waaa.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a aku gila!!!!!

kerinduan seorang kekasih

2010-04-15T07:41:00.002+10:00

___________________________________________________________________
Yazid: Sir pernah mimpi mak sir tak?
tuan abang: Tak pernah! tapi memori dia sangat kuat. Tak hilang rasanya. Kehilangan dia mmg kuat rasanya. Dah takda dah kekasih saya...
___________________________________________________________________

Aku sangat penat. Jam di handphone menunjukkan pukul 1245 pagi. Aku masih la bersms dengan pelajarku, adik dan juga kakakku. Terngiang-ngiang suara kakak ku petang tadi "Dua tiga hari ni Cikpah teringat sangat pada mak. Malam esok kita buat kenduri ya." "ok" jawabku laju dan cuba menukarkan topic. Sms student ku tidak ku balas.

Ramainya orang kat mall ni. Kiri kanan orang berjalan. Ada sale mungkin. Kakak sulungku sedang makan di food court. Aku harus balik dulu. ku berjalan keluar dari mall itu. Tidak semena-mena, aku terdengar orang mengaji. Suara itu sangat familiar. Siapa yang sedang mengaji?

Aku kenal benar suara tu. Itu suara mak. Eh? mak? Ya! Itu suara mak! Di mana. Semakin kuat suara itu. Aku berlari masuk ke dalam mall. Aku cari. Mana mak? mana dia? aku redah orang ramai! aku sudah tidak peduli, Itu suara mak. Ya itulah suara mak sedang mengaji Al-Quran seperti yang aku dengar selalu. di waktu maghrib selepas solat. Di waktu siang selepas zohor dan kadangkala di waktu subuh selepas solat. Itu suara mak! tapi mak dimana/

Mak? Mak telah tiada. Mak telah kembali menemui Penciptanya. Ah? Betul! aku sendiri yang mengiri janazahnya hingga kekuburan. Aku menyaksikan segalanya. Bisik hatiku!

Aku rindu suara itu. Air mata jatuh sangat laju. Aku tidak tahan lagi. Orang ramai di sekeliling memerhatiku. Aku tidak peduli. Itu suara mak.

Lantas aku berlari menuju je food court. kakak sulungku sedang makan, aku tidak peduli. Aku terus memeluk dia. Aku menangis semahunya. Air mata terud menitis suara mak mengaji semakin kuat.

"Kak Chaq. Itu suara mak!", kataku pada kakak ku. Kakakku turut menangis. Kami berpelukan disitu. tudung kakakku basah kerana airmataku.

Suara itu makin kuat. Sangat kuat, aku tidak tahan lagi. Aku sangat rindukan suara itu. Aku rindukan mahu bersalaman dengan pemiliknya. Aku mahu mencium pipinya. Aku mahu mendengar suaranya di hujung minggu membangunkan aku untuk ke pasar. Mahu mahu makan semeja dangannya. Aku mahu melihatnya senyum walaupun dia berduka. Aku rindukan rungutannya dan leterannya. Aku mahu mendengar suaranya. Aku mahu pulang ke rumah, memberi salam dan dia menyambut salam ku. Aku mahu balik ke rumah dan lihat dia tersenyum padaku. Setidaknya dia sedang solat didalam bilik seperti selalu. Aku rindukan ikan masin masak asam yang dia masak. Aku masih teringat lambaian dia setiap kali aku mahu pulang. Aku rindu ingin mendail telefon dan mendengar suaranya. Aku rindukan berbalah dengan mak. Aku rindukan bau mak. Aku rindukan berbual dengan mak. Aku rindu mak!!

aku berlari keluar dari mall itu. Air mata aku bercucuran laju. Aku tidak peduli. Aku berlari. Suara mak makin kuat. Sangat jelas. Itu memang suara mak mengaji. Tapi mak telah tiada....

Aku terjaga dari tidurku. Airmata aku masih laju jatuh. Suara mak tetibanya berhenti namun masih terngiang2 di telinga. Aku menangis lagi. Jam di handphone menunjukkan pukul 5. 30 pagi.

Ya Allah. Aku mimpikan mak. Aku terdengar suara mak dalam mimpiku. Aku sangat rindu. Dia kekasih ku. Baru sekarang aku sedar. Kenapa aku tidak sedar sedari dahulu? aku menangis lagi. Air mata semakin laju. Basah bantalku. Aku terus menangis. Rindunya aku pada mak.

Aku sedekahkan Alfatihah buat arwah. Lantas aku bangun dan mencoretkan segalanya disini. Aku mahu semua orang tahu bahawa kesakitan rindu pada seorang ibu ialah kesakitan yang sangat hebat. Aku pernah kehilangan kekasih, orang yang aku sayang. Namun, sakit kehilangan seorang ibu tiada tolok bandingnya. Sakit rindu yang sangat hebat. Mak... aku sayang mak.

Aku berdoa.. Ya Allah! Peliharalah ibuku di sana. tempatkanlah dia di samping hamba-hamba mu yang soleh. berikanlah dia kedamaian dan ketenangan. Sampaikan ya Allah, salam rinduku padanya. Kerinduan seorang kekasih. Amin.

Air mataku semakin laju.

Alfatihah buat ibuku, kekasihku, ratu hatiku, Jamaliah bt Saad.
Amin.

.........................................................................................
Oh! Ibu
Kau disiram bayu pagi
Kehilangan terasa kini
Dan kesepian

Dan aku
Bagai purnama gerhana
Di ibarat lautan kering
Tiada tempat ku layarkan

Hasratku ini
Masih belum sempat
Kubuktikannya kepadamu
Ibu tersayang
Kucurahkan rasa hati

Ku tatapi potret mu berulang kali
Kurenungkan kalimah yang diberi

Tuhan Yang Esa
Ampuni dosa ibu
Tempatkan mereka
Di antara kekasih kekasihMu

Oh! Ibu
Kau kasih sejati
Kutaburkan doa
Untukmu ibu

Ampunilah dosaku
Sejak ku dilahirkan
Hingga akhir hayatmu

Saat ini
Kuteruskan hidup
Tanpa bersamamu ibu

Ibu...

One love

2010-04-11T18:42:00.004+10:00

Another song that I love. Read and feel it! Will post the video when connection is good .

Oo yeah!

O.N.E L.O.V.E
David Guetta feat Estelle

Can anybody help me I' m outta plans
guess I left my world in somebody’s hands
I don’t like to hurt but
but everyone gets weak
someone to rely on
that’s what I really need

Now here we stay
its all that were worth
I’ve been thru the pain and been dragged thru the dirt
whatever they tell you
were bigger than words
I’ve been where your standing

I know how it hurts let this be a song now and
this be a day and we stand together well be okay
Because were survivors were making it work
expecting the best when they hope for the worst

One love - this is the way we found
One love - even though they'll let you down
One love -nobody’s perfect now
One love -don’t let that hold u down
One love - lets stick together now
One love -we got to stand our ground
One love - its easy to believe in
One love - believe in u and me
Onee loveeeeeeeee

Now I cud try and fix this all by myself
but I know it’d turn out better if u help
no one likes to hurt but
but everyone gets weak
someone to rely on
that’s what everybody needs

Now here we stay its all that were worth
I’ve been thru the pain and been dragged thru the dirt
whatever they tell you were bigger than words
I’ve been where your standing
I know how it hurts
let this be a song now and this be our day
and we stand together well be okay
Because where survivors were making it work
expecting the best when they hope for the worst

Forever in life.. that is for sure!

2010-04-11T13:56:00.003+10:00

Somebody gave me me this song. I listen to it several times and I m loving it. Thanks.

Forever In My Life Lyrics

Uhoh yeah yeahhh ohh

The way your part of me,

I would have to re-learn everything,

If you were to leave,

So fast you make me feel like was autumn leaves,

And honestly... there a perfect explaination

Why you feel so good to say that your

[Chorus:]My love, my love, my love

I'll give you all my love if you, if you,

If you don't change a thing,

About the way you hold me everynight,

So right, I wanna mate like you forever in my life.

I'm a stick inside a jar,

Turn the lid and set me free,

I love everything that you are,

Has a million other reasons,

But let's not go to far,

Stay, close to my heart,

When I think about the future,

I am right there where you are,

Cause you're...

[Chorus:]My love, my love, my love

I'll give you all my love if you, if you,

If you don't change a thing,

About the way you hold me everynight,

So right, I wanna mate like you to say you're,

My love, my love, my love

I'll give you all my love if you, if you,

If you don't change a thing,

About the way you hold me everynight,

So right, I wanna a mate like you forever in my life.

I know, that you, would never leave me hanging,

Hanging out to dry in the wind,

I know that we haven't seen the worst of it,

But when we do, I promise you we'll stick it out together.

[Chorus: x2]My love, my love, my love

I'll give you all my love if you, if you,

If you don't change a thing,

About the way you hold me everynight,

So right, I wanna mate like you forever in my life.

So right, I wanna mate like you forever in my lifeeeeee...

I am...

2010-04-11T13:53:00.001+10:00

...... lonely.... the one that I love doesnt care for me anymore. enough said....

T_T

Inikah cara anak menebus dosa mengabaikan ibu bapa??

2010-04-11T13:24:00.003+10:00

بسم الله الرحمن الرحي م

السلام عليكم

Abah berwasiat supaya kubur abah dan mak jangan dijadikan mangsa "penebus rasa bersalah" anak-anak. Maksudnya begini: Semasa ibu dan bapa masih hidup, anak-anak mengabaikan tanggungjawab mereka atas pelbagai alasan (sila rujuk kitab-kitab muktabar tentang tanggungjawab anak terhadap ibubapa) - alasan sibuk dengan urusan dunia yang tak akan habis sampai bila-bila, sibuk dengan urusan anak, isteri/suami masing-masing, sibuk dengan itu dan ini, hingga lah "tiba-tiba" salah seorang atau kedua-dua ibubapa mereka diperintah Allah untuk kembali kepadaNya.....

(sebenarnya tak ade kematian yang mengejut atau tiba-tiba - setiap kematian itu telah dirancang Allah lama sebelum manusia itu dijadikanNya.... "tiba-tiba" itu hanya "tuduhan" manusia kerana bukankah kita rasa seronok hidup! Malahan pujangga dengan angkuhnya mendeklamasikan "aku mahu hidup 1,000 tahun lagi!)... Dalam kesedihan kerana kematian mereka, timbul lah rasa bersalah si anak kerana telah mengabaikan mereka semasa hayat, maka dilakukanlah perkara-perkara seperti berikut:

1. upah orang bacakan Al Quran 40 hari, 40 malam (anak tidak pulak membacanya kerana maklum lah sibuk belaka....)

2.. upah orang bina kubur yang tercantik dan terhebat ("mak/abah memang patut diberi penghargaan ini kerana jasa mereka kepada aku"...)

3. tabur berbagai-bagai bunga atas kubur ("aku sayangkan mak/abah"... walhal semasa hidup mereka, sekuntum bunga pun tidak pernah dihadiahkan!)

4. cetak kitab Yaasin (siap tulis kat kulit depan "sempena kematian ibu/bapaku tersayang....") dan edarkan kepada masjid - macamlah surau dan masjid tak cukup-cukup kitab Yaasin

5. buat kenduri panggil "orang masjid" bacakan doa tahlil (maklum lah, anak tak sempat mendoakan ibubapanya. lagi pun "doa orang masjid ni lebih berkat"....)

6. buat pelbagai kenduri "hari peringatan ke-3, ke-7, tahun ke-47....." kematian ibubapa

7. sedekah pisang kat masjid.........

8.. buat upah umrah setiap tahun (walhal dulu semasa hayat mereka, langsung "takde bajet nak hantar mak/abah gi umrah"; lagi pun keperluan umrah itu hanya sekali sepanjang hayat sahaja!)

Selepas itu boleh lah si anak tidur lena dan sempat pula membidas adik beradik lain dengan berkata, "aku dah tunaikan tanggungjawab aku pada bapak/mak. Kau tak buat ke?"

Abah panggil semua ini sebagai "sindrom penebus rasa bersalah"- kerana "dulu aku tak buat semua itu, maka sekarang aku dah buat semua ini, jadi aku tak bersalah lagi!"..... Kalau inilah yang bakal terjadi kepada abah dan mak, maka abah berwasiat di sini, TAK PAYAH LAH anak-anak abah bersusah payah membuat pelbagai justifikasi dengan sindrom penebus rasa bersalah..... memadai lah diselitkan satu ayat yang tak sampai satu nafas nak menyebutnya -

"Ya Allah, ampunkan lah ibu bapa ku".

Takde belanja wang ringgit, tak payah cari orang, tak payah susahkan diri.

Sempurnakan solat (wajib untuk penebus diri sendiri masing-masing) dan doa lah meminta apa-apa dari Allah (untuk mendapat penebus diri sendiri masing-masing) dan selitkan lah ayat di atas(sebagai penebus diri sendiri dan untuk keselamatan ibubapa di alam barzah dan alam akhirat). Abah doakan apa-apa amal jariah yang abah dan mak lakukan dan apa-apa ilmu bermanfaat yang abah dan mak ajarkan kepada sesiapa pun dan diamalkannya - agar semua ini diterima Allah sebagi pelaburan kami di akhirat.

Semoga semua anak-anak yang lahir dari sulbi kami menyempurnakan janji-janji mereka kepada Allah untuk menjadi hamba-hambaNya yang beramal soleh. Itu lah 3 harta yang akan mengiringi kami ke kubur dan tinggal kekal menemani kami sehingga kiamat........ Ambil iktibar dari lampiran di bawah.

Larangan dari Rasulullah shallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: Dari Jabir radhiyallahu 'anhu, dia berkata,

"Rasulullah shallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam telah melarang kuburan dikapur (di simen), dijadikan tempat duduk, dan juga didirikan bangunan diatasnya.." (Hadith Riwayat Imam Muslim)

Dan membawa bunga-bungaan / jambak-jambak bunga dan seumpamanya bersama jenazah adalah diharamkan yang telah menular di kalangan orang-orang Islam kerana mengikuti adat-adat orang kafir dan Melayu kunoh dalam upacara-upacara jenazah mereka. Juga kerana perbuatan tersebut boleh mensia-siakan harta tanpa faedah dan memberi makna bermegah-megah dan berbangga.

Manakala hukumnya adalah haram jika kubur dibina menggunakan marmar (marble) dan seumpamanya, kerana amat berlawanan dengan ajaran Rasulullah shallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, juga kerana terdapat pembaziran harta yang ditegah syarak serta terdapat sifat bermegah dan menunjuk yang amat dimurkai Allah subhanahuwata'ala.

Ali bin Abi Talib radhiyallahu 'anhu berkata kepada Abi Hayyaj Al-Asadi,

"Tidakkah kamu mahu aku utuskan kamu untuk melakukan perkara yang aku diutuskan oleh Rasulullah untuk melakukan? Kamu hendaklah meruntuhkan semua berhala dan meratakan semua kubur yang ditinggikan orang."

(Hadith Riwayat Imam Muslim)

Firman Allah dalam surah Al-Hujurat ayat 6 yang Tafsirnya:

"Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Jika datang kepada kamu seorang fasik membawa sesuatu berita, maka selidikilah (untuk menentukan) kebenarannya, supaya kamu tidak menimpakan sesuatu kaum dengan perkara yang tidak diingini - dengan sebab kejahilan kamu (mengenainya) - sehingga menjadikan kamu menyesali apa yang kamu telah lakukan."

Wallahualam...

serabut serabai and everything in between...

2010-04-08T12:30:00.004+10:00

dah lama tak jenguk ke blog. tengok2 ada orang kasi award la plak. huhu! terharu nih! bukan mudah le orang nak kasi award neh. boleh letak dalam resume tak? beutiful blog awards.. huhuhu..

design wise, i dont think i deserve it, but content i dont know. may be just MAYBE orang yang kasi tu rasa ada something kat content ni kot. Hmm. well as I would say, I just spill all my tot here. Language wise, kalau rajin aku semak, kalau tak, ate lantak je le...

last few weeks mmg aku berada dalam state kritikal. even now pun. airmata menjadi sangat murah. mood sangat mudah swing and sangat mudah tersentuh. aku dah lama tangguh nak post cerita pasal akhir hayat mak aku, tapi asyik tertangguh. bila taip sikit, mata jadi kabur coz air mata bergenang. selama ni aku ingat aku kuat, rupanya aku tidak.... hmm..

2-3 minngu ni juga menyaksikan betapa teruknya aku dikerah bekerja. tak cukup tido, tak cukup makan. badan makin cengkung sampai ada orang kata aku ambil drug! hell no! check la my urine kalau tak percaya.

last weekend, kawan2 yang sungguh baik hati pakat turun mai penang! i had great time. For once, in a couple of weeks, i manage to smile , and that was for sure. kalau tak aku murung je and FB le jadi kawan. Main pet society sampai tak ingat dunia. tapi 2-3 minggu ni tak sempat dah nak masuk FB lelama. Tido tak cukup, makan tak cukup... wuh!!! layak la aku jadi panda... mata hitam..

erm... ni plak jadual aku 2-3 menjak ni. ada orang kata aku ni pentingkan kerja daripada diri sendiri. I just want that person to know that I need to work to stay alive. I need to work to gain income so that aku boleh belanja, makan, minum and bayar hutang. So i need to work. And to tell you the truth, what I have now, mmg tak cukup. So i need to do part time job. Kalau mcm Mimin tu aku akn sangat gembira, balik je dari study dah boleh tangkap civic. aku ni? nak tangkap beskal pun tak mampu. so camno??

I m rethinking about my career. Mcm stagnant and tak de perubahan. I m thinking of making a change. Pindah, tapi kalau dalam sistem yang sama buat apa? bila plak aku nak merasa pakai civic (aku tak minat civic, sorry... saje je nak buat contoh!) aku lebih kepada toyota.

camry? no way! its going to be a waste.. toyota yang murah2 sudah la... huhu.. aku tak suka kereta lebar, tapi aku suka kepada kereta yang tinggi.

ada banyak lagi aku nak tulis tapi aku kena g kelas lah. hmmm

serabut, serabai dan semua yang seangkatan... hmm....

This song touches me DEEP now! At this very moment!

2010-03-15T13:43:00.002+11:00

"When You're Gone"

I always needed time on my own

I never thought I'd need you there when I cry

And the days feel like years when I'm alone

And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take

Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart are missing you

When you're gone

The face I came to know is missing too

When you're gone

The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok

I miss you

I've never felt this way before

Everything that I do reminds me of you

And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor

And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take

Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]

We were made for each other

Out here forever

I know we were, yeah

All I ever wanted was for you to know

Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul

I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

of my bro and his talentime..

2010-03-04T00:45:00.003+11:00

Hallo... I cant sit still tonight since I got to know that my bro is going to participate in a karaoke competition aka Talentime at his college. I was waiting for him to give me green light to call him just wanna give him some advice. Today, I did call him. I was in my class when we gave me the green light to call, so I gave my students a task to work on, and I made a quick call to my bro. He will be singing 2 songs ( 1 malay, 1 english). English song would be his forte, so I have no need to worry! However, malay song would be a problem to him. He loves Faizal Tahir, however, I keep on asking him not to sing Faizal's song since they are all very high and they need the singer to push their lungs out (figuratively ok!).

I sang with my bro several times, obviously I dont have the singing talent. But I know a thing or two about singing ok. My bro has a very jazzy clean voice. Very nice. However he can ot sing high note. When it reaches high note, his voice becomes so tight. And my bro's personality too. he is not the jumping up and down type of guy! he is very decent! Even during our karok session, he would control his movement. In contrast, I would be running up and down the sofa! haha. that is so me!

Well to tell you the truth, when I was still young ( YEARSSSSSSS) ago, I did praticipate in a singing competition. Singing used to be my forte! I was ketua nasyid ok! I had my own nasyid group. It was yearssss ago! for the competition, I did not win. I fought with another competitor since he stole my song! Grr...! After that, when I reach maturity, I loose the ability so sing since my voice has become croaky! hehe. That's the truth.

Ok... back to my bro's case. Tonight he will be singing and he has no idea on what to wear! Well obviously I m the one who always commented on his dressing, so today I advised him on what to wear. He insisted in wearing a berel. So I had to include the berel in his to-wear list!

However, he has to sing in front of the library and there is no place for him to get change. I couldnt stop thinking about it and hoping that he would call me again so we can discuss the matter over.

Just now, around 8 something while I was vacuuming my house, I checked my hp and I received an sms from him, asking about what to wear! I was lost! I couldnt really imagine him in the shirt that he described to me. I really need to see him so that I can comment. He tried to mms his photos wearing those shirts, unfortunately, those mms failed to reach me. Suddenly, I got an idea. I dug in my wardrobe and tada! These are the result!

This is my first suggestion! But this is rather tedious since he has to change his shirt.

This is the set that we have decided for English song. He will wear a berel together with this set.

,

This is the set for his malay song! huhu! He might be wearing a berel too.

These, however, would be my own imagination and rendition! I m waiting for the real photo from him..

By the way, all the best bro. I know you love it so much! yup! you and singing can be NEVER separated. You need to practice more, i mean Malay song! And I am willing to accompany you! Jom karok!

By the way.. I m so sorry bro since during CNY we did not have proper karok session ,where you could have practiced for your competition. I am terribly sorry. T_T

Tonight, I m losing my voice. Why? Sore throat and heavy coughing.

To my brother..... ALL THE BEST! I AM EXPECTING A GOOD NEWS.!

Insyallah! ^_^

P/s: My bro is going to compete, but I am the one who has shivers down to my spine. How i wish I could be the and support him.... owh yes... with a banner and not to forget my loud wail..... GOOOOOOOOOOOO CIPOLLLLLLLLL! haha

All Good Things...

2010-02-24T14:44:00.006+11:00

Haida lent me her CDs. In one of them I found this song. I love it! .... It is sung by Nelly Furtado.

Enjoy its lyrics... it means deep. really DEEP!

All Good Things (Come To An End)

Honestly what will become of me

don't like reality

It's way too clear to me

But really life is daily

We are what we don't see

Missed everything daydreaming

[Chorus:]Flames to dust

Lovers to friends

Why do all good things come to an end

Flames to dust

Lovers to friends

Why do all good things come to an end

come to an end come to an

Why do all good things come to end?

come to an end come to an

Why do all good things come to an end?

Traveling I only stop at exits

Wondering if I'll stay

Young and restless

Living this way I stress less

I want to pull away when the dream dies

The pain sets it and I don't cry

I only feel gravity and I wonder why

[Chorus]

Well the dogs were whistling a new tune

Barking at the new moon

Hoping it would come soon so that they could

Dogs were whistling a new tune

Barking at the new moon

Hoping it would come soon so that they could

Die die die die die

[chorus]

Well the dogs were barking at a new moon

Whistling a new tune

Hoping it would come soon

And the sun was wondering if it should stay away for a day 'til the feeling went away

And the sky was falling on the clouds were dropping and

the rain forgot how to bring salvation

the dogs were barking at the new moon

Whistling a new tune

Hoping it would come soon so that they could DIE

I know what you did last CNY! pt 1

2010-02-23T13:57:00.012+11:00

Dear all.

I dont know how to describe the joy that I had last week. I didnt have full 7 days holiday like the rest of school teachers, but I did enjoy it! even not to the fullest. By any chance I would love to extend it, but the problem is ...I couldnt! T_T. Here, in this limited space, I 'll try my best to describe the short holiday that I had. Tiring.. indeed.

Friday ( 12 February 2010)

The day started as usual. Tiring! I had to go to work and got to settle tonnes of works (again as usual!) however that day I was so highly spirited. My bro was coming home. Yeay! I miss his company a lot. He had a week holiday and he had bought expensive ticket too. I usually stay alone at home, with his company at least I am not that bored. There would always be somebody to disturb. He was free that Friday even though at first he said he had test, he had quiz, he had class, but around 10 am, I received a very beautiful mms from him. OMG! He was working on a project. He was so busy with his artsy project. If I am not mistaken, he has to prepare 22 artworks for the whole semester. Gosh! Since he is taking PSV (Visual Arts Education) no wonder la he has to work so hard. And I do understand his situation. I had worked on artworks also before and to tell you the truth I couldnt sleep just because of that. My case would be a bit different. I couldnt work if the sun is out and about. So I will start working after midnite. So I couldnt sleep, of course.

My bro's work! nice eh? *2 thumbs up*

Back to the story, my bro took a train from Seremban to KL. He did arrive in KL early. His bus to Penang was scheduled to be around 4.30. UNFORTUNATELY, his bus had been postponed from an hour to 4 HOURS. He was so pissed off. To add in the excitement, he realised that the price that he had to pay for the ticket was much more expensive than other passengers. He had to be there for hours and all he got to know was that he had to pay more. gosh! Buses these days! Around 7.30++ the bus did arrive and off he departed from the smelly and hot PUDU. In the bus he did blab a bit, but after that he dozed off, (actually he did not, but his phone was! haha).

My sister called me around 9.00pm asking me to arrive at my kampung earlier since my mum was planning to have a kenduri. I dared not drive after 12 am since I would surely know that my eyes would not even stay open even for 5 mins. So I told her that I would arrive at my kampung after suboh!

My bro arrived in Butterworth around 1 am. At that time I was on my bed, trying to sleep. Upon receiving his call, I woke up and off to fetch him at the bus terminal. He was so tired. I was tired too. When we arrived home, off to bed! zzzzz

Saturday ( 13 February 2010)

I woke up really early since my mom wanted me to arrive home early. I tried to wake by bro. I insisted him to follow me since I know there will be tonnes of food prepared for the kenduri. Well to tell you the truth, when there is a kenduri at my house, and when my eldest sister, Kak Chaq and my sis in law, Kak Yang, are around, they would surely prepare delicacies. Usually there would always be many leftovers. Hmm.. that was why I wanted my bro to join me since I know my bro loves food A LOT!. If he stayed at my 'rumah burung' alone, there was definitely no food available and he had to go and buy some. After some attempts, my bro couldnt get up! My sister called me and kinda gave me a slight angry tone since I hadnt arrived. So, I resulted in going home alone without my bro. My bro was still sleeping. I was a bit pissed off, but what to do, he was tired. So I let him slept. I rushed back to my kampung, Parit Buntar.

When I arrived, it was around 8.oo am, I was so shocked to see that there were only 3 cars. Baak's volvo, B.Jun's wira and K.Chaq's Spectra. Where were the rest! I thought they were all ready for the kenduri. As I stepped into the living room, I felt like exploding. Why? Most of the males in my family were still sleeping! wargh!!!! Felt like burning the house. I was rushing madly just to think that every body was awake and ready to roll, but then... sigh! I was so frustrated. Luckily nothing bad happened to me (since I was speeding like mad on my way back! sigh)... frust and mad indeed. I kept quite for like an hour! Like I always do! :p

The ladies were all getting prepared for the kenduri and they were all in the kitchen cutting this and that, frying this and that. Baak was awake and he asked me to help him with the rock mellon.

This is rock mellon (if you havent seen one before.)
The peeled rock mellons

For the kenduri, the rock mellons were freshly picked from their farm in Puchong. My bro in law grows them. He wants orang kampung to try them. He brought home all the way from Puchong. That morning I was incharged of peeling off the skin of these rock mellons. To tell you the truth the skin is rather thick. huhu! But it was an easy job!

After that, as usual, I couldnt sit still. I must keep my hand on something. I must do something. To just sit there and do nothing would definitely not me. So I started to gibble here and there and finally, I was the one incharged of the dining table and I had to prepare the table for breakfast.

Some of the food for brekky! (havent been arranged just yet. lambak je!)

As i mentioned earlier there were tonnes of food. For breakfast we had nasi lemak, satay, cakes, this and that....! The table was full with food. Once everybody got ready, around 9.30 we had our breakfast.

My anak2 sedara were having their brekky by the paddy field!

Owh, not to forget, before that Kakak and EE arrived from Klang. Two more cars were added in front of my mom's house. Now the compound was full with cars. EE had to stop several times along the way since the highway was full with traffic. He nearly hit the car in front of him since he was so sleepy. The traffic jam was bad. So he had to stop like 4 times. Stopped and went to sleep. Fortunately, all my family members were able to make it before the kenduri. My makcik, pakcik, pak long, pak ngah, all of them made it to the kenduri. My mom was so happy! It had been her doa' since our previous kenduri.

Talking about our prevoius kenduri in 2008, to tell you the truth, we (the whole family) were VERY dissappointed since it was not properly organised. The kenduri doa selamat which meant for me (as that time I was leaving to further my study in sydney) and for my mum since she had just recovered from a terrible sickness, did not turn out well. Guests did not turn up! Only some managed to attend. There were many food left. My mom was sad! And becoz of that, she planned another kenduri which happened last CNY. This time around, the kenduri was a success!! My mum smiled all the way!

2b continued...

akibat terlalu dekat

2010-02-23T13:46:00.002+11:00

Akibat Terlalu Dekat

Seorang penjual telur sedang sibuk di kedainya. Seorang pelanggannya yang sedang memilih telur ingin menguji kebijaksanaan si penjual telur. Dalam diam dia mengambil sebiji telur dan digenggamnya di dalam tangannya.
“Jika awak bijak cuba teka apa yang ada di dalam tangan saya ini?” katanya pelanggan itu menunjukkan genggamannya. “Cuba berikan aku bayangan,” pinta penjual telur. “Benda ini bentuknya seperti telur,” ujar pelanggan. “Lagi?” “Warnanya seperti telur.” “Lagi?” rayu penjual telur lagi. Pelanggan tersebut menggeleng-gelengkan kepalanya lantas berkata: “Belum cukup lagi? Baiklah, jika dimasak rasanya seperti telur. Ia cair dalam keadaan biasa tetapi bila dipanaskan ia menjadi pepejal.”
Penjual telur masih terpinga-pinga. “Tolong berikan lagi pembayang yang lebih hampir.” “Di dalamnya ada cecair yang berwarna putih mengelilingi warna kuning!” Setelah berfikir panjang, penjual telur menjerit: “Aku tahu jawapannya! Ia sejenis kuih!” Pelanggan menggeleng-geleng kepala. Lantas membuka genggamannya. Ya, hanya sebiji telur…………apalagi?
Pengajaran:
Manusia sering menjadi ‘buta’ dengan apa yang terlalu hampir dengan dirinya. Orang yang paling hampir selalu dipinggirkan, tetapi apabila orang itu sudah tiada, baru terasa kehilangannya. Ya, kerap kali sesuatu itu tidak dapat dilihat bukan kerana terlalu jauh, tetapi kerana terlalu dekat.

This is what I usually feel..... so close but yet, so far!... care more for me please....

I miss you!

The Heart of Life

2010-02-10T13:41:00.004+11:00

As I was browsing through some songs, then I found this song! It sounds soo soothing! I checked its lyrics.. hmm not bad! So people, try to appreciate the song! I will try to post the video soon, I mean once I get a hold on to my lappy. huhu.

To my bro, read the lyrics and think deep.

"The Heart Of Life" - John Mayer

I hate to see you cry

Lying there in that position

There's things you need to hear

So turn off your tears

And listen

Pain throws your heart to the ground

Love turns the whole thing around

No it won't all go the way it should

But I know the heart of life is good

You know, it's nothing new

Bad news never had good timing

Then, circle of your friends

Will defend the silver lining

Pain throws your heart to the ground

Love turns the whole thing around

No it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good

I know it's good

VVIP+language camp = brain damage

2010-02-09T16:27:00.002+11:00

I m quite shocked when I was called to my boss’s office yesterday. She wanted to break the “good” news to me. I could feel that something bad was coming, so I gathered all my might and walked into her room.

Yup! Indeed! He informed me that our unit’s English Camp (intended to participants from 4 polys in northern region) would have to be postponed. I was.. yeay! Why? Since I have been appointed as the project manager, I have been working for the proposal for the past few weeks. I got a sample from an ex-colleague of mine, so I have edited and submitted it, so now I can just throw them away. But, keep your seatbelt intact coz worse is coming...

Let me first describe how I want the camp to be. I want to have a simple yet memorable English Camp where at the end of the camp, the participants would feel tired and satisfied. A few hiccups here and there would be ok, but, I want participants to come to me and say, “En… We want more!” That is all I want it to be. But my boss is a bit ambitious. She wants it to be big and if possible she wants the press to know about the camp. By looking at the number of staff here, I m really sure that there is nothing much can be done. I can now see their colors. I have spent the last 6 months observing them, and now I know who can work well, and who would be the benchwarmers. In all, work here would be more tedious than my previous workplace. Here everything needs to be 'grand' and everything must involve everybody, doesn’t matter whether he or she is willing to participate or not. The tension builds when those benchwarmers have the time to enjoy and relax, while the others have to perspire their kidney out (wow! Absurd choice of word).

There is this one staff, which I really think, wants to be the project manager so bad. Today he told me that he is not really believe that I can do it since I have no experience in doing or conducting such activity before. He keeps on telling me that the activities for the camp must be this and that. Gosh! I guess he doesn’t know me.

Previously, years ago, I handled English camp too. We invited some staffs from other polys and of course participants from our own. To tell you the truth, --well, I m not trying to boast--- but I was the one who made the camp livelier. I created the judging system, the flags, polished up the activities and most of all, I kind of ran the whole show too. The main project manager handled a few things and later he did other things which I can’t recall. He talked a lot about this and that but lastly, it was I, and of course with some help from others, who ran the whole program.

Not to forget the English Race. At first, all of them were against the idea of having such activities. I was so stressed out! I asked my English club members to run the show, and we did it! After that, English Race 2 was a big success. English race 3 did not materialize since my new boss insisted on something else, and I was so busy with Annual Report and bla bla bla bla. But students and lecturers have been asking for more of English Race. I am so proud to be the project manager, the person who initiated it there. I did not sleep for nights just to prepare for the event.

Later, I handled Night of Enchantment! Again, students were scared to participate. They questioned the purpose of the event. They question my objectives. The result was tremendous. Students loved it! Even though it was not up to my par, and to me, what they did was far below my standard, but they did it! They wanted more. but then...then… I furthered my study!

I wanted to tell the person who doesn’t believe in my capability, that I can actually do it!. Well I may look young, but don’t question my ability, coz you’ll never know.

Ok…

About the language camp.. My boss will never cancel the event, but she wants to postpone to next semester and she wants it big! My boss wants the camp to be huge and she wants at least a 'menteri' or a politician to come and officiate the event. This is because the event will be dragged out of the normal budget, and it will be put under a special project which will use a different, special budget. If I m not mistaken RM40 mill will be allocated for the new budget. My boss wants me to get at least 10K for the camp. I am quiet shocked. First, I have never dealt with ‘menteri’ before.. Well I had once dealt with ‘menteri’ KPT last two years when he came to PTSB for a glamorous officiating ceremony. However, I didn’t deal with him directly. We used agent. However, for this language camp, the ministry wants us to deal directly with the menteri without any help from any consultant! OMG! It’s a big thing, how can 13 staffs in my department work on it! Well 13 is like a big number. But not all 13 can work well. There are some gaffes and giraffe here and there. So, I don’t know. If it is a poly’s work then, I think it will be ok, but now this is like… a unit’s work! So?? What do you expect? And that might be the reason why one of my colleague said, I don’t think you can do it! Huhu! We’ll see.

I don’t think this is workable. I think this is just a dream that take efforts -- i mean BIG EFFORT-- to be fulfilled. But look again, if it does happen and it is a success, my career would jump to the next level. A so-called-young lecturer with minimal experience has actually gone further and does an event which is big. But, if it doesn’t work, they will point to me and say, “no wonder la, it didn’t work! A young inexperience lecturer has been given the role as the project manager, what do you expect?”

I don’t know. My life is getting better these days. I m happy with my life, and my problems have seemed to go away and I love where it is heading. I have a simple life, a just nice life, some cheerful friends and not to forget I have the best brother one could ask for!

I m getting better and happier, and I want those that I cherish the most to be happy too. Let us spread the happiness k! huhu. XOXO ^_^

hold on there....

2010-02-05T18:37:00.002+11:00

As I was listening to buble today, a very nice song had actually grabbed my heart down, and took flight! So here, I want to share it with everyone. Enjoy! I dedicate this song to those special people in my life! thanks for everything!

saya sayang kamu! XOXO.. yes you!

HOLD ON - Buble

Didn't they always say we were the lucky ones.
I guess that we were once, babe, we were once,
But luck will leave you cursed, it is a faithless friend,
And in the end, when life has got you down,
You've got someone here that you can wrap your arms around.

So hold on to me tight,
Hold on to me tonight.
We are stronger here together,
Than we could ever be alone.
So hold on to me,
Don't you ever let me go.

There's a thousand ways for things to fall apart,
But it's no ones fault, no it's not my fault.
Maybe all the plans we made might not work out,
But I have no doubt, even though it's hard to see.
I've got faith in us, and I believe in you and me.

So hold on to me tight.
Hold on, I promise it will be alright.
Cuz it's you and me together,
And baby all we've got is time.
So hold on to me,
Hold on to me tonight.

There's so many dreams that we have given up.
Take a look at all we've got,
And with this kind of love,
And what we've got here is enough.

So hold on to me tight.
Hold on, I promise it will be alright.
Cuz we are stronger here together,
Than we could ever be alone.
Just hold on to me,
Don't you ever let me go.
Hold on to me, it's gonna be alright.
Hold on to me tonight.

They always say, we were the lucky ones.

Stupid?

2010-02-04T20:09:00.003+11:00

hunch?

2010-02-03T12:41:00.002+11:00

Hunch : a feeling that sth is true even though you do not have any evidence to prove it.

Hmm... yesterday, around 6 pm i got an sms from my ex-colleague, kak fadzilah. we were quite close back then when i was in Kulim. She is like a sister to me too. Ya la, we had been working for years. However it is not her that i want to talk about here, but about her hunch. hmmm..

In the smses she said,

1st: " Zaki, ok ke skrng? Sihat?"
2nd: " i dint know whether it's just a hunch, tapi dok rasa macam zaki dok susah hati je"

I was shocked. I havent seen her for like weeks now (since a few weeks before we and a couple of friends went out for a farewell lunch) and she has got this 'hunch'.. hmm! kindda weird! did my not so well being - lately- can be sensed all the way to kulim. hmm... i hope not.

ya! i guess her 'hunch' is indeed true. I m indeed susah hati jugak but i know i can handle them. Just that i need to have fun more. Last weekend i indeed had fun. Went out for a movie la, for a mandi manda, yup! i indeed had fun.

The person that accompanied me is indeed much welcomed. I just simply laughed my heart out. How i wish i can be like that for the rest of my life. hmm.. everyday, 24 hours a day.

That weekend, I just forgot how terrible I felt! I was having fun fun fun! yup! and i m looking forward for more times like that.

Just want to share with you guys,

It is not how you spend your time, but with whom you spend it with which really counts.

by the way, yesterday my pet latip got a very beautiful window with Sydney background from Cipol's pet, Kyuti. OMG! I was so touched. I dont know why, but I miss spending time in Sydney. I miss my friends there. Julia, Mimin, Boy, fatin, Ejan, Ili, Anis, Izza etc. Ramai tu! lepak2, buat BBQ, ambik gambo tak hengat dunia. So when I got that window, I was so..... sad! seriously. Miss the time a lot! back then, everything seemed to be ok. My FB was active, My YM was active. My blog too and everyday, i was very sure that I would be receiving some emails or YM from my best buddy, cipol. But now, everything has changed. He is busy with his study and daily chores. hmm.. those are the things that i miss the most.

i had no regret whatsoever for being in Sydney! I could be myself and i had fun being the gila-gila person. here, I m a bit terbatas la. Why? because I have to bear the "public figure" status. But, just wait and see, I'll just let myself go and burst the bubbles. I tried in some of the classes, and trust me, i will keep it coming. haha!

Living in sydney was like living in a dream. Its a memory that I would never want to forget. Bad things happened there but everything seems so sweet now. Having Boy as a roommate, having firdaus as a roommate, buat2 kecoh di FB, everything seemed so... memorable. When i was there, i could feel how i was drawing nearer to my family, to myself and to people back in Malaysia. If you ask me, why I miss sydney so much, I can spend days talking about it.

Why i am moody and down and sad when I am here? 1st.. i had to adjust to my new environment. everything needs to be adjusted. i had to start from square 1. Make some new friends, face some new expectation, and of course letting go of what I had before. Who would NOT be miserable when you have to endure all this. However, there are so many things that I encounter when I am in Malaysia. I now find new company. Yup i am talking about Cipol here. He has been so good to me, and for once in my life, i could say that i have a buddy, a brother. Thank you bro. U will always be the best.

not just that, friends which used to spend time with me at sydney pun dah jadi among my best friends. Izza, Fatin, Ejan, mimin and of course the ever popular Julia. So, when I m bored, i just simply text them. thank you guys.

see.. i told you earlier that I can go on and on and on just by talking about the time spent in sydney. Even until now I would feel like jogging at centennial, lepaking at coogee, shopping at bondi, eating pizza at golden pide or eat at TOT! In all, yup.. I miss sydney.

But for now I have got new life and i must live with it. I m still learning to cope with it. So, bro, if you said I m not stable, I would agree with it. I m not stable JUST YET. I m still finding my way through. But trust me, I know myself very well, the face that i have to endure will go away very very soon. Now i m happy with my life, i m happy with what i got and as i would always say, I know whatever happens, ALLAH will always be with me.

most of all THANK YOU ALLAH for the life that you have given me.

OMG pink!!!

2010-02-02T00:48:00.002+11:00

I watched this on youtube.com. I was so impressed! how can a singer sing while spinning like that! Pink is so damn good these days! hmm... Go pink!

I kind of like the song too! Glitter in the air! Nice one. hmm! enjoy!

Glitter In The Air Lyrics

Have you ever fed a lover with just your haNds?
Closed your eyes And trusted, just trusted
Have you ever Thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?
Have you ever looked fear in the face
And said I just don’t care

It’s only half past the point of No return
The tip of the iceberg
The sun before the burn
The tHunder before lightning
The breathe before the phrase
Have you ever felt thIs way?

Have you ever hated yourSelf for staring at the phone?
You’re whole life waiting on the ring to prove you’re noT alone
Have you Ever been touched so gently you had to cry?
Have you ever inviteD a stranger to come inside?

It’s only half past the point of oblivion
The hourglass on the table
The walk before the run
The breathe before the kiss
And the fear before the flames
Have you ever felt this way?

La La La La La La La La

There you are, sitting in the garden
Clutching my coffee,
Calling me sugar
You called me sugar

Have you ever wished for an endless night?
Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight
Have you ever held your breathe and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight?
Tonight

My plan for CNY holiday..

2010-02-01T16:53:00.003+11:00

Hmm... CNY's break is just around the corner and I m hoping that I will make it. Hmm..

Here are some plans which I think can be done. Cipol, if you think I should add more, just tell me so k. huhu...

1. watch movie: Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

2. Sushi time

3. Pasar Ikan Manhattan

4. karaoke session

5. watch movie : The Wolfman

6. jog. Venue: Mengkuang dam

hoh? ini je ke? Well I should add more. Yup more. But? DO I have time? sob sob sob!

jika kau...

2010-01-27T16:54:00.003+11:00

Jika kau

Jika kau rasakan dirimu memerlukanku

hampirlah padaku

dengan hati yang tulus

seikhlasnya

jika kau rasa dirimu ditekan
hampirlah padaku
akan kucuba ungkaikan tekanan itu
dengan sedayanya

jika kau rasa dirimu ditindas
hampirlah padaku
akan ku usaikan belenggu itu
dan nafaskan kebebasan mu

jika teman yang kau perlukan
cubalah aku
akan ku temani mu
semampunya bersahabat dengan mu
dan menghela kesunyian

jika kasih yang kau dambakan
halakan wajahmu padaku
biarku belai diri mu
dengan tulus diriku
semampunya

kerana aku mahu kau tahu
aku sentiasa disini buat dirimu
dalam jerit perih
dalam suka gembira
tiada halangan itu semua
kerana aku mahu kau tahu
aku disini
menanti.

--------------zack---------------------------------------------------------------------------

mak nenek!

2010-01-27T14:48:00.003+11:00

Penawar Sakit Kepala

Jika anda sering diserang sakit kepala, selain makan ubat amalkan petua ini :

Ramas beberapa helai daun sirih di dalam mangkuk yang berisi air.
Kemudian basahkan kepala dengan air dan daun sirih tersebut sambil memicit-micit kepala selama 15 minit.
Tumbuk enam helai daun sawi hingga lumat. Campurkan dengan sedikit garam, lumurkan serta gosokkan perlahan-lahan pada dahi dan pelipis.
Ramas asam jawa sebesar telur ayam dengan secawan santan lalu tapis. Kemudian basahkan kepala dengan air suam lalu bungkus. Biarkan seketika dan kering di kepala, barulah basuh bersih. Rasa sakit akan berkurangan dan rambut jadi lembut.
Tumbuk dua atau tiga helai daun setawar hingga lumat. Kemudian tempekkan di kepala dan balutkan. Biarkan semalaman.
Rebus beberapa biji kulit manggis dengan tiga gelas air. Biarkan sehingga airnya tinggal satu gelas sahaja. Tapis dan buangkan hampasnya. Berkumur setiap hari tapi jangan sampai terminum pula airnya.

Sakit kepala lagi?

Setiap orang mungkin mengalami sakit kepala yang amat sangat akibat tekanan di tempat kerja dan sebagainya.Jadi untuk menghilangkan rasa sakit kepala itu, ambil tiga atau empat keping asam gelugor atau asam keping. Rendamkan dalam air suam semalaman. Minum air tersebut pada keesokkan harinya. Insyaallah sakit kepala anda akan hilang serta merta.

Tak hilang jugak sakit kepala?

1) Tidur sambil berzikir membantu meredakan kebanyakan jenis sakit kepala. Tidurlah seketika di siang hari jika anda sakit kepala. Sebaiknya tidur sekejap sebelum masuk waktu zuhur kerana ia merupakan sunnah Nabi s.a.w. Tapi jangan tidur selepas Asar, ditakuti mewarisi ‘kegilaan’.

2) Rehatkan otot-otot dan fikiran anda. Berhenti dari melakukan kerja atau berfikir tentang masalah.

3) Seringkali juga sakit kepala disebabkan oleh kelaparan, oleh itu jangan biarkan diri anda berlapar terlalu lama.

4) Jalan dengan cepat atau bersenam ringan dapat membawa oksigen ke otak, menurunkan rasa tertekan serta menyebabkan badan kita mengeluarkan endorphin, unsur penahan sakit semulajadi. Jangan dok main game facebook saja!

5) Mengurut boleh melegakan otot dan memperbaiki pengaliran darah dan mengurangkan rasa sakit kepala. Mari kita pergi rumah urut ! waheyuuuu!

Mengurangkan Tekanan

Ubat untuk anda mengurangkan tekanan ialah dengan mengambil air kelapa muda. Campurkan dengan air perahan limau nipis. Minum dengan satu nafas sahaja.

Mententeramkan Jiwa

Cara untuk mententeramkan jiwa ialah dengan membaca al-Quran sekurang-kurangnya sekali sehari pada waktu malam atau pagi.

Sebagai teman

2010-01-26T13:56:00.005+11:00

Especially to my best bro (encik adik) and to all my friends... I love you all. each one of you is SPECIAL!

Sejauh manakah ketabahan hati

menempuhi dunia

walaupun kau jauh

kau tetap di hati

teman ku percayalah...

begitu tulusnya perhatian kamu

kepada diriku

hidupku berombak

namun kau selalu ada kuatkanku

Oh.. mengapa .. dunia ini begini

ku cuma manusia biasa

yang hanya inginkan hidup seperti yang lain

mengapa harus begini?

sejak hari itu hatiku terluka

namun ku sembunyi

ku juga mengerti

walaupun terselindung

kau teman...

aku fahami...

Oh Tuhan

tunjukkanlah jalanMu

padaku untuk bahagia

selamanya....

kuatkanlah diri menjalani semua ini...

blog entry

2010-01-25T16:13:00.004+11:00

many to write.. but I have decided not to write any... for now!

heh heh heh.. aiyoks!

ko mesti suka ni bro..

2010-01-22T12:33:00.001+11:00

olololololoooooo!

felt what?

2010-01-22T11:42:00.002+11:00

felt pretty much NOT ok yesterday. I was trying to put myself to sleep around 6 pm, hoping that i could put my mind at ease. But, I failed. I was tossing and turning atas katil for like an hour, but i couldnt put myself to sleep. I thought i was so tired and sleep would heal. But, nope! it was the same.

I didnt know what to do. Tried not to touch my lappy. so i was walking around the house. Felt "like" hungry. I ate some cheezel that i bought that day! then, sat in front of the tv watching a malay series. Cha O Mei (if i m not mistaken!) Bad acting, bad script and bad choice of actors as usual. Didnt really understand the storyline, but i watched it anyway, out of boredom.

Azan maghrib... i got ready, went to surau. there was a kuliah last night. so listened to the kuliah for like 45 minutes. Then I couldnt stand it anymore. Not the kuliah, but my back. My back pain kind of getting worse. So, i went home and performed my isya'. Doa! yes! that is all I need! Allah's assistance.

then, picked the laundry and folded them nicely while watching blogger boy and then AI. I was trying NOT to switch on my lappy. but i failed. Click here and there... sometimes I wish i dont even subscribe to broadband. Since I used it a lot last time, to YM and all, but these days... sigh!

latip got some presents from kyuti. thanks bro.

then, kemas2 sikit.. and off to bed. again, it was not and easy task. pusing pusing pusing. i didnt realize what time i fell asleep. But i know for sure I woke up several times (as usual). I had restless night (as usual), sleepless night (as usual)... check my hp at 2 am. got 2 messages. checked it again at 3 am, and then 5 am, and then 6 am!

6.30 i had enough!

around 7.40 i tried to eat some cereal, but think again... dont want! so off to work! on Hot.FM. they used to make me laugh. but now, even the jokes were really good, i just lift my lips a bit. Thats it!

now.. i m in the office, trying to recall how miserable I am. Its friday.. I m trying to enjoy it... but can i?

i want to b happy

2010-01-22T01:45:00.000+11:00

object width="425" height="344">

Happy lyrics

Verse 1:
Someone once told me that you have to choose
What you win or lose
You can’t have everything
Don’t cha take chances
Might feel the pain
Don’t cha love in vain
Cause love won’t set you free
I could stand by the side
And watch this life pass me by
So unhappy
But safe as could be

Chorus:
So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear myself
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me
Cause I’m just trying to be happy, yeah
Just wanna be happy, yeah

Verse 2:
Holding on tightly
Just cant let it go
Just trying to play my role
Slowly disappear, ohh
All these days I feel like they’re the same
Just different faces, different names
Get me outta here
I can’t stand by your side, ohh no
Watch this life pass me by, pass me by

Chorus:
So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear myself
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me
Cause I’m just trying to be happy, ohh, happy, ohh

Bridge:
So and it’s just that I can’t see
The kind of stranger on this road
But don’t say victim
Don’t say anything

Chorus:
So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear myself
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me

Outro:
I just wanna be happy
Ohh, yeah, happy, ohh, happy
I just wanna be, ohh
I just wanna be happy
Ohh, happy

eating disorder

2010-01-21T18:15:00.005+11:00

this is me before...

I was trying to do my work but, my mind cant concentrate. Instead, here I am writing this blog. *sigh*

lately I m having strange eating habit or i can refer it as eating disorder. I dont feel like eating at all. I dont seem to feel hungry! my stomach would be grombling, grawling, but after taking a bite or two, i would feel full and would stop eating.

Yesterday, I bought tomyam and nasi kosong. Hoping that the sourness of the tomyam would make me berselera untuk makan. But, unfortunately... nil! Nero. I didn't even touch it! last night I took only 2 roti gardenia! hmm... yesterday I had my brunch at 11.00 am. I took some rice with a cruncy fried catfish. I ate it halfway and then i got bored. So I stopped. So there you go!

Actually I m sick of eating! I would eat something for a couple of minutes, then I would just stop eating. Everything seems so ... i dont know.. not interesting.

early today, I went to the cafe and tried an omelette set. It looks really delish and it does taste good too. But again, after a few munches, I got bored. and I 'throw' them down my throat. for lunch, i went to ikan bawal. Again, i didnt not eat ikan.... Instaed I took jelatah, telur goreng and bergedel only! owh! with a jambu. No nasik. itu je la! huhu.

I m getting skinnier lah! huhu! I have no intention of becoming skinny. I just want to loose my belly a bit. But this is too much! No! I dont chow any diet pills or in any diet plans. i just dont know!

this is me NOW!

digest this...

2010-01-21T11:25:00.003+11:00

to everybody, especially to my bro...

digest this...

as human we would never be free from having problem. It depends on how we see them, handle them and cope with em. One day you will look bak and say, hey... been there, done that.

the most important thing is to remember that you are strong enough to face em all. eventhough you think you cant face it, but actually you can. see how far you have gone now. try to look back and see how different you are now. You are stronger, you are a fighter. Keep on fighting. dont surrender. Surrendering what you have tried so far will be a waste. Lust and needs are two different things. Infiltered lust would make you enjoy temporarily but suffer later. but needs need determination and strong motivation to achieve. How weak you think you are, how bad you think you are, well... see how well you have become now.

the beauty of being a human is that we have akal. this akal makes us think what we want, and what we dont! use our akal properly and we will be ok.

lust will always hunt us, This is where akal comes in. If we let syaitan controls our lust, then we will would surely do what we shouldnt do. Fight! Fight! Fight! let akal controls our lust but not lust controls our akal!

I m hoping for your very best

I m hoping for your success..

most of all, I m praying for you to be on the right path!

Insyallah! you will be ok! My prayers would always be FOR and WITH you... ALWAYS....

kenangan berpusing disekeliling..

2010-01-20T19:15:00.004+11:00

i know, lepas baca blog ni, mmg ada ramai yang akan marah aku, especially my bro la! dia akan kata, "kata dah move on, ni tak.... bla bla bla".. ye ye.. aku dah move on! aku dah kembali menggila mcm dulu! tapi tadi le insiden yang membuatkan aku cair! lalalala... slurp!!

gini kisahnya...

aku kena g public post coz nak kena setel beberapa hal MUET ni. so tetiba, bila tingkap kaunter serahan tingkap dibuka..aku terus... weeewoooooweeewoooweewoooo! apa taknya, wajah yang pernah menjadi kesayangan ku tetiba muncul! wok! aku mcm... erk?!?!

hohoho! sebnarnya, itu bukan ex aku, tapi itu ialah seorang gadis (my ex-student) yang muka dia mmg sebijik mcm ex aku dulu. dulu kalau rindu-rinduan, muka itu juga aku lihat .. (GATAL!) tapi, gadis itu dulu dipunyai oleh seorang lagi student aku, dalam kelas yang sama gak! gadis tu used to be kepunyaan Wafiy (Capang). Tapi aku dapat tahu masa di OZ dulu, si Wafiy dah clash ngan si gadis tu coz katanya gadis tu dah jumpa orang lain and tak sanggup tunggu dia nak sambung belajar! aku pun.. hek?? wei! ex kita muka sama, and kita sama2 kena buat mcm tu! wuhuhu! adakah semua yang bermuka sama akan bertindak sama.? adoyai! tapi apapun, dah lama aku tak contact si wafiy tu! nanti nak balik pi jengok dia kat FS la! apa la khabar si wafiy tu! tapi yang aku tahu dulu, last year, wafiy dah dapat girl baru! and he is having fun! mamat hensem, mana la tak dapat ganti cepat kan? so.. best of luck la to him.

cumanya aku ni laa... tadikan, bila dia tegur.. "en Zaki kan", aku macam... aiyooooo!! meleleh! kamu kamu kamu! kamukah! kemudian rasa mcm nak minta no tel je.. ye la.. ex student aku tu! mahulah aku keep in touch kan (GATAL 3X)... huhu.. tapi aku teringat si wafiy, terus HELL NO! i m NOT gonna date her, and aku tgk kat jari dia ada kesan inai. walaupun kat kuku, aku rasa dia dah kawin. tapi dia dah jadi gadis la.. aiyo!! meleleh lagi! slurp!! santek siut!!

masa drive balik dari p.office tu, mula la hati ni meracau, merantau, and merayau... kenangan lama datang menyapa... wuhuhu... tapi aku ingat pesan bro aku, so cepat2 aku gelakkan je. hoho! so takde la! itu just sekali je, meleleh kejap! tapi.. adoyai! ayunya dia! wowowowowowo! AYU!!! AYUUUUU! hmm.... sedih plak, tapi tanak sedih dah! aku dah ckp pada kawan2, Julia, and janji to my bro yang aku akan cuba happykan diri! yeah yeah! so HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY!

Happy zaki in coming through people, so please make way! Throw confetti sikit! weewit! kaboom kaboom!

*now i m happy coz aku ada bro yang syiok and best! wuhuhu! so happy days continue!... smile smile smile.. and not to forget my kawan2 yang juga sangat baguih! gedik gedik sket! huhuhu! miss you guys.. A LOT! T_T

kerja lahhh sayang!

2010-01-19T21:12:00.004+11:00

O.M.G! tadi baru habis meeting! wuwuwu! terbeliak mata ku melihat senarai kerja yang aku kena buat untuk sem ni. To start with, aku kena handle ENGLISH CAMP NORTHERN REGION! gila la wey! northen region tu! memula dorang nak buat bulan February, a few days after raya cina.. HELL NO! aku dah ada plan baekkk punya! tapi nasib baiklah my boss kata tak boleh nak buat lepas CNY coz ada apa tah! so aku pun.. WUUHUUU! YESS!

pastu nak buat bulan 3 plak, hampir2 dengan cuti skolah! sekali lagi aku HELL NO! mana boleh! cuti sekolah tu ada mcm2 tu! hehehe. Then luckily boss aku ckp bulan MAC dah byk aktiviti. so dorang bawak ke April! Alhamdullillah! Bulan April mmg takde apa. kalau si adik nak balik pun, ok je, bisa diatur. hehe.. yeay yeay! So English Camp bulan April! wuuhuuu!!! tapi kalut sikit ah coz ada benda lain nak kena buat lagi! esok ada meeting lagi, so kena bincang lagi!

selain tu, nama aku naik berkali2 untuk MUET! astaga! kena jadi penyelaras la plak! nasib baik tak mcm kulim! kulim dulu 2 pusat! tapi sini dorang hadkan 1 pusat je. so tak la aku perlu berpusat2! just jaga pusat exam dan pusat aku je. hehe! (Gross!)

pastu , dalam table tadi nama aku ada di mana2. aiyok! hampir terduduk aku! keluar abis semua air! especially hidung cos aku selsema, so agak terkejut juga. nampak gayanya sem ni akan tak duduk diam la. huhu. so sedih one!

tapi aku mcm mana busy pun aku akan buat masa untuk orang2 yang aku sayang. so pada anda semua (you know who you are!) dont worry, busy mcm mana pun aku tetap akan ganggu korang semua seperti biasa. harapnya korang pun sama. jgnla stop ganggu aku k. I promise, how busy I am I will always make time for you! I PROMISE!

hari ni aku agak flat jugak coz tak berapa sihat! selsema ni! makan ubat and aku mmg agak2 ngong skit! dari pagi aku dok tertunggu2 sms yang sentiasa aku tunggu! kalau tak dapat sms ni mmg aku sgt dull. Bukan apa, pengirim sms tu mmg orang yang sangat penting buat aku and dan antara orang2 yang penting dalam sejarah hidup aku! kalau takda brita dari dia, mmg aku betul2 lost! mmg aku tak tipu!

tapi biasa la, busy kan... emm... tapi tghari tadi dapat 1 sms yang dah berbulan aku tak dapat! adoi! seronok rasa! aku tak sangka a simple sms like that can actually make me jumping up and down! adoi! mmg betul aku tak tipu! tiba2 rasa kembali bernafas. TQ la ek! you know who you are! you are not just a friend, you are my family, a part of my life. so please hold on to it k! and please note that you are SO DAMN important to me!

hmm... mcm ni la bila hidup menumpang kasih orang lain. Tak pernah ada apa yang orang lain ada. so bila ada, mmg terasa sangat happy! jadi aku rasa tak salah kot kalau aku ni rasa gembira mcm ni! i am 30, and only now aku jumpa orang yang buat aku rasa, well I am not alone! TQ buddy! U r the best! and please always be!

It is funny though how can a simple sms can change someone's life. So keep 'em coming! tapi aku ni ckp betul, bukan semua orang mcm aku, bila aku kata aku suka, aku sayang, aku rindu, tu mmg betul2 aku maksudkan. bukan just nak jaga hati ke, atau just to fill in the emptiness ke. tapi it is for REAL! I am a man of my words. Bila aku kata aku tak suka, mmg aku tak suka! kalau aku suka, mmg aku suka! takde la mcm.... kat tengah2! so harap anda mengerti! and I m the type yang akan reveal my emotion! aku happy mmg nampak aku gelak! kalau aku diam, monyok, mmg ada yang tek kena! so harap anda faham ok!

jgn salahkan aku sekiranya aku suka and ask and crave for comforting words like, "I love you forever", or 'I miss you", or "you are my bestfriend", coz who doesnt???

c ya!

we know we are ok, when we are ok!

2010-01-18T15:28:00.003+11:00

I m ok, you are ok!

What's going on tonight? Is everything alright?
I hope that nothing's wrong. I haven't seen you
in so long.

I'm away, you're here to stay and I'm away and
you're ok
You're here to stay and I'm away, you're here to
stay and I'm ok

What exactly do you do, when I'm not with you?
What exactly do you say, all the time that I'm away?

You tell me nothing's wrong
Seems like I've been gone oh so long
Nothing seems to have changed
Yet the familiar things seem all so strange

crita hantu yang emo sikit... emm emm

2010-01-17T19:33:00.008+11:00

i m back after beberapa hari of silence. Hari ni ahad, my brother aka my best buddy dah betolak balik. sedih plak rasa. ye la. bukan selalu dia balik penang. Ni tah bila plak dia nak balik lagi. Ye la, bila ada geng, barula aku ni kuar jalan2 and have fun, kalau tak aku ni rasa hidup aku gloomy je. sedey pedey! jalan sorang, makan sorang. sedey jek. so... sad kan? this is the fact that a single guy at 30 must face. what to do! it is fated.

well. my bro dah balik, kalau ikut aku tanak le dia balik ke seremban. tapi I must face the fact that he has his own life. Kalau dia dok penang, mcmana dgn dunia dia kat sana. takkan la kerana nak temankan aku lepak2 dia kena balik penang. ingat apa? bapak dia sultan brunei ke? hmm... tapi mmg rasa sedih la. now, i m back. sengsorang layan cerita kat tv. Ni cerita Ali Setan 2. yang tahapa2.

aku ni tak gemor la cerita2 yang baca skrip sebiji-sebijik ni. letih! fake gila! ni slalu filem melayu la. kenapa nak kena kata : "sebelum aku pergi, izinkan aku menatap mata mu?" kan ke mudah kalau di ckp " woi! tengok sini! aku nak cakap! " kan lebih natural. Ni tak! aiyo! nak cerita satu2 benda tu pun take years. hish! bengong! tapi aku rasa aku sangat anti cerita2 mcm ni sebab aku ni jenis kalau aku rasa apa, aku luahkan je kot. so maybe itu la pasal aku tak gemo berbahasa buku ni.

hmm... ckp pasal luah2 ni, aku pun kdg2 rasa bengkek gak ngan diri aku sendiri. aku suka sangat luah apa aku rasa,kdg2 buat orang marah. buat orang kecik hati. pastu nanti orang tgk aku, orang lari. tapi nak buat mcmana. aku dah mcm ni. so if you like me, like what comes with the whole package. I can be bossy some times, and be so busy body. tapi selalunya bertempat. Aku busy body pada orang2 yang very dear and close to me je. Tak kira la, kawan2 ke , family members ke, students ke. Coz aku mmg tanak tgk orang susah atau dapat susah. aku dah puas susah, so aku tanak orang lain dapat susah. so kalau kdg2 aku busy body bukan kerana aku ni suka busy body, just I care too much! ni aku petik lirik lagu come home dari one republic tu!

"Everything i can’t be Is everything you should be And that’s why i need you here..."

so pada sesiapa yang ada rasa mcm aku tersibuk dalam hidup dorang please forgive me. As I always said before. I m a no nonsense person. Everthing I do, i would do them for reasons. bukan pakai tembak je k. hmm.. and most of the time because of sayang!

i also hate the fact that people can't lie to me. Spooky eh? but that is the fact! kalau orang tipu, mesti aku dapat tahu. walaupun aku cuba tak nak ambil tahu tapi the truth akan cucuk aku. argh! last skali aku sakit hati! tapi takpa, I m used to that! and aku sedar kadangkala orang kena tipu coz nak jaga kebaikan bersama. ye la. tgk je la aku ni mcmmana, kdg2 aku tak tido malam coz fikir yang pelik2 , and fikir panjang berjela. sedangkan benda tu sikit je. Tapi that is me. My brain is just TOO strong. Tapi aku dah faham sekrang yang apa orng buat tu ada baiknya. Coz kadang2 kalau diberitahu, akan mengeruhkan keadaan. so better keep it lah. so, i m ok with that! and aku tahu, orang tu sayang aku. dia tanak aku fikir panjang2, tak tido coz pikir benda2 tu semua. hmm... case close. i know you have good intention.

hmm... my bro ada penang sejak jumaat malam. so. jauh dia balik. kesian la! naik bus berjam2. terhantuk atas bus la. duduk seblah orang ada B.O la. then dia sakit kepala. tahan kencing (haha! ini tak bleh blah, setiap kali balik sure sampai penang je kalang kelibut cari toilet. haha). tp TQ to him la, coz sanggup balik. Sonok betul, walaupun boleh kira la brapa jam je bleh lepak2. tak sempat nak g mandi ayor terjun pun! aku pun dah lama tak mandi air terjun. so ingat nak le g air terjun harini lepas p buat IC kat kulim. tup2, aku baru teringat yang di kena balik semula ke seremban sebelum pukul 11 malam. and I agree with him, tempat dia tu sucks! hmm... apa punya ground rules. cheit poodah! sabar la bro. mcm aku slalu kata pada dia la, sementara nak lepas. nanti kalau dah lepas, haa... you will be free. hmm...

ok dia sampai je penang aku dah agak dah, dia mesti kebulur punya. so seperti biasa makan time. P makan sate le. itu yang dia suka. lepas makan apa lagi... MOVIE TIME..!!! huhu (ni aktiviti wajib ni!)

dok rancang2 nak tengok cerita seram. walaupun aku ni sebnarnya tak suka cerita hantu, tapi aku nak cuba gak le. ye la, dah tua. mana la tau kot2 dah berubah, dah tak takut cerita hantu. so malam tu rancang nak tgk JU ON- black ghost white ghost. tapi dah takde midnite (Alhamdullillah), pastu tgk ada PARANORMAL ACTIVITY. so aku pun, kata la pada diri aku sendiri, "alah ! cerita hantu omputih! apa la sangat!" walaupun agak cuak juga. tapi, aku tak kisah, akuk ngikutkan je. tapi seyes, cerita tu agak menakutkan! haha! adala jugak beberapa part aku tutup mata! haha! bukan apa tak sanggup nak bertentang mata dengan hantu2 ni, nanti jatuh chenta, haaaa.. kan susah! so buka mata sikit jer! huhu. tapi aku tak miss storyline. Yang aku nak tergelak, si cipol tu yang beriya2 nak tgk crita hantu, tapi dia terhenjut2 terkejut bila ada part2 yang mcm suspen. keja aku? gelakkan dia! haha! well what to do! aku mmg suka gelak! haha! tetapi pada sesiapa yang nak tgk movie tu, sila la! best wooooo!

then hari sabtu tu, aku sangat letih! aku bgn tido pun dah kul brapa dah! ye la! it was a busy week for me! apa taknya, dah start buat kerja2 FRP. so kalau ada masa mengulor tu, sangat la aku gunakan. Gi makan kat ikan bawal (ni jaja ngan su yang kenalkan pada aku) pastu g ke gurney coz nak tgk lagi crita hantu! plan nak tgk JU ON ngan CASE 39. Ingat taknak g seberang, tapi cinema kat sini takde movie yang nak tengok tu, so kami ke Pulau la. sampai sana dah kul 3++. ingat nak g ambik tiket, pastu nak g camwhore kat feringhi ke. sekali bila ke cinema tengok2, timing tak baik. so tak jadi g camwhore, terus g tgk movie. I dragged cipol along! haha. nasib baik la bro aku tu tak byk kerenah. walaupun dia sebenarnya request nak tgk JU ON kat cinema yang ada kat tepi kawasan kubor and nak cari cinema yang ada kisah berhantu yang tersendiri. huhu. tapi sorry bro, your request tak dapat aku grant la. haha.. sah2 sahla takde mall seblah kubor kat msia ni. so.. layan je la.. Ju On pun not bad. Takowt gak! hantu dia asyik sendawa, and cipol seperti biasa, akan terkejut, terkejut! hehe. aku? gelakkan je. hehe.

pastu g tonton case 39 plak. woo. ni pun best! aku tak penah tgk si Rene Zelweger belakun cerita genre mcm ni! slalu dia bawak watak blonde yang ala-ala. tak pun yang ada kisah klakar2 skit. Tu yang aku tak sabar2 nak tgk tu. then kitorang tgk movie kedua pukul 9.45mlm. sempat la g makan dulu! si cipol dok sebut pasal prosperity burger! so lepas makan MCD, pi toilet, terus masuk cinema! Ramai gak orang tgk movie ni! so, ok la, tak la takut sangat! yang malam tu aku tgk PARANORMAL tu, cinema tu cuma ada aku, cipol and 2 orang penonton lain! takowt weh! Masa tgk case 39 ramai, so ok la. lagipun dia tunjuk hantu sikit2 je. Lelain more like psychology. But I like. so sesapa yang blum tonton, sila la . sila! Movie ni ada ciri2 mcm the Orphan! I like!.

Hmm.. balik dah malam, kul 12 tghmalam singgah stesen bus. ambil tiket si cipol. pastu balik. kul 2 baru aku tido coz burn lagu. pastu zzzzzzzz......

hmm, pagi ni bgn awal coz nak temankan si cipol buat IC baru. tapi tak jadi coz dia tak siap apa lagi. so, lain kali la. lepak tgk tv, pastu dalam kul 11pg, kuar makan and hantar si cipol ke bus station. pastu baliklah my bro ke seremban. and aku.. tinggal sengsorang.... hmm.. tak tau nak buat apa, singgah kat Sunway Carnivale jap, pusing skali dlm 15 mins. aku dah bosan. ingat nak g jusco. tapi tetiba mood tak ok. balik umah, buka tv. now.. masih depan TV sambil dok taip blog.

sms cipol, ingat nak gangu dia dalam bus tu, tapi takde respond! tido la tu. hmmm

Hmm.. my bro dah balik.... sob sob... lagu COME HOME by one republic kembali berkumandang!

dari kerana mata...

2010-01-15T16:21:00.003+11:00

well well well.... what is it?

aku sebenarnya agak bengang pada sorang makhluk Allah ni. mata dia dah merah, sakit mata, tapi dia datang keja jugak. apa yang harus aku atau kami lakukan akan dia balik rumah dan ambik MC. Sakit mata sangat mudah berjangkit. ye la kami takde pi bersentuh kulit ke, tangan ke dengan dia, tapi please la. Mata tengah teruk tu, so balik la. Ni kalau jangkit pada semua mcmana? dah la sem baru nak bukak. nanti dah dapat reputasi yang terok coz sem baru bukak, tapi kelas tak boleh nak masuk.

kalau ikut rasionalnya, mmg kami semua terdedah kepada penyakit ni. Ye la, apa taknya, semua akan pegang tombol pintu yang sama, semua akan pegang surat khabar yang sama, so mmg tendency for us to be infected is very high. even at the moment of speaking ni pun aku rasa mata aku pelik.. hehe biasa la! aku kan over emosi. tapi please laaaa..... aku nak masuk kelas besok oi! kenapa la datang keje? pi la balik. pi la! shuuh! shuuh!

so sebagai langkah berjaga2, aku akan lapik tombol pintu agar tidak terkena kulit ku. Tidak berada hampir dengan beliau. Aku sedang menjauhkan diri ni. lagi? apa aku perlu buat neh?

hmm... ni pun dorang nak pi solat jumaat dengan dia, aku tanak. .. biarla aku pi sorang, sekurang2 nya jauh dari dia.

kalau korang ditempat aku, apa korang nak buat??

tapi kalau sakit mata and mata jadi biru mcm pic tu, aku sangat suka la. huhu..

sakit mata?????

TiiddaaaaakkkkkK!KK!K!K!K!K!K

aku di tinggalkan lagi... :(

2010-01-15T00:15:00.003+11:00

Petang tadi aku balik rumah kejap, tetiba aku tengok balang ikan ku berwarna agak pelik. Bila aku perhatikan, tidak kelihatan ikan, juga teman aku yang sentiasa ada dengan aku kat dalam rumah ni sejak mula-mula aku melangkah masuk ke sini. Skrang dia dah tak ada! Dia telah pulang kerahmatullah! Aku redha dengan pemergian dia. Aku doakan rohnya ditempatkan bersama ikan-ikan yang beriman. Dia ialah ikan yang baik. Amin.

Bye bye buddy! :(
Thank you so much! :(

Aku ditinggalkan sendiri.... lagi... sob sob

aku akan berkabung... selama 44 minit!

HeLL yEAh!!!!

I was tagged!

It stays here!

...^_^...of all the people in this world...^_^...

Keletihan Julai... tapi seronok juga...

Guys in action HUARGHHHHH!!!!!!!

Love it love it LOVE IT ... A LOT!

Raya Raya!

I can now online non-stop!... weeeee!!!!

cinta teragung

Pondering Point "-_-

YOU SUCK AT LOVE!

Last night...

Emotionally Not Good At All!

Tips 2: We are contributing to our own problem in the classroom!

Some good tips. No 1: No Shush!

Confession of a single working guy!

I have been Quite Quiet!

Alfatihah buat Azaryna Noh (aka. Aza)

Monday is THE DAY!

Watch this if you are bored!

wanna watch these movies???

I m Diamond. -_-"

Durian oh Durian!

Terrible night... Last night!

Gosh! What have I done??? Y_Y

10 things I hate!

What Do I Have In My Playlist? ~My Top 10 Fav Songs (in many categories)

10 things I love

10 things about me

I should be dancing! huhu ^_^

Droooling... Salivating....

When I said BZ... I mean it!

Blurbing; Part 4.5: of HOT.fm and pee in public

blurbing: part 4 : preview

Blurbing: Part 3- My cool last week!

blurbing: Part 2- Hatyai Trip- plan!

Blurbing: Part 1- intro, exam, plus capik!

Open Your Eyes

Dear Mommy...

exploded!

just wanna say.......

Secret VS Suprise

SMS at 4.44 a.m!!!

I hate goodbyes!

Sharing is caring...

Photos and their stories...

I m 30, I m busy BUT I m happy

a special wish

soothing song for Ramadhan.

the bizzare case Of chicken pox

*sigh*........ -_-

I m finding my comfort

Ya Allah...Rasa itu kembali

What I have learned from Toys....

I m not OK today

of me and my dot dot dot life..

i am special..but I am not THAT special...

...of many things that I need and I missed...

aku dan MACAM MACAM

kerinduan seorang kekasih

One love

Forever in life.. that is for sure!

I am...

Inikah cara anak menebus dosa mengabaikan ibu bapa??

serabut serabai and everything in between...

This song touches me DEEP now! At this very moment!

of my bro and his talentime..

All Good Things...

I know what you did last CNY! pt 1

akibat terlalu dekat

The Heart of Life

VVIP+language camp = brain damage

hold on there....

Stupid?

hunch?

OMG pink!!!

My plan for CNY holiday..

jika kau...

mak nenek!

sigh........ -_-